Human bonding

Source: Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia.

Human bonding is the process of development of a

interactive process, and is different from simple liking. It is the process of nurturing social connection
.

Bonding typically refers to the process of

trust. Any two people who spend time together may form a bond. Male bonding refers to the establishment of relationships between men through shared activities. The term female bonding refers to the formation of close personal relationships between women. Cross-sex friendships refers to personal relationships between men and women.[2]

Early views

In the 4th century BC, the Greek philosopher Plato argued that love directs the bonds of human society. In his Symposium, Eryximachus, one of the narrators in the dialog, states that love goes far beyond simple attraction to human beauty. He states that it occurs throughout the animal and plant kingdoms, as well as throughout the universe. Love directs everything that occurs, in the realm of the gods as well as that of humans (186a–b).[3]

Eryximachus reasons that when various opposing elements such as wet and dry are "animated by the proper species of Love, they are in harmony with one another... But when the sort of Love that is crude and impulsive controls the seasons, he brings death and destruction" (188a). Because it is love that guides the relations between these sets of opposites throughout existence, in every case it is the higher form of love that brings harmony and cleaves toward the good, whereas the impulsive vulgar love creates disharmony.

Plato concludes that the highest form of love is the greatest. When love "is directed, in temperance and justice, towards the good, whether in heaven or on earth: happiness and good fortune, the bonds of human society, concord with the gods above—all these are among his gifts" (188d).

In the 1660s, the Dutch philosopher

Spinoza
wrote, in his Ethics of Human Bondage or the Strength of the Emotions, that the term bondage relates to the human infirmity in moderating and checking the emotions. That is, according to Spinoza, "when a man is prey to his emotions, he is not his own master, but lies at the mercy of fortune."

In 1809 Johann Wolfgang von Goethe, in his classic novella Elective Affinities, wrote of the "marriage tie," and by analogy shows how strong marriage unions are similar in character to that by which the particles of quicksilver find a unity together through the process of chemical affinity. Humans in passionate relationships, according to Goethe, are analogous to reactive substances in a chemical equation.

Pair bonding

The term pair bond originated in 1940 in reference to mated pairs of birds; referring to a

animal monogamy). The incidence of monogamy in primate species is similarly low in contrast with polygyny (one male mating with two or more females), the most common pattern.[4] However, regardless of mating patterns, primate life is typically characterised by long-lasting social relationships (whether sexual, care-giving, coalitionary or otherwise) formed in the context of living in durable social groups,[4] and any such durable relationship (whether exclusive or not) is characterised by some degree of bonding. Similarly, whilst the 'naturalness' of monogamy in humans is debated,[5]
durable monogamous or polygamous relationships will typically be accompanied by affectional or emotional bonding (see next section).

Limerent bond

According to limerence theory, posited in 1979 by psychologist Dorothy Tennov, a certain percentage of couples may go through what is called a limerent reaction, in which one or both of the pair may experience a state of passion mixed with continuous intrusive thinking, fear of rejection, and hope. Hence, with all human romantic relationships, one of three varieties of bonds may form, defined over a set duration of time, in relation to the experience or non-experience of limerence:

  1. Affectional bond: define relationships in which neither partner is limerent.
  2. Limerent–Nonlimerent bond: define relationships in which one partner is limerent.
  3. Limerent–Limerent bond: define relationships in which both partners are limerent.

The constitution of these bonds may vary over the course of the relationship, in ways that may either increase or decrease the intensity of the limerence. A characteristic of this delineation made by Tennov, is that based on her research and interviews with over 500 people, all human bonded relationships can be divided into three varieties being defined by the amount of limerence or non-limerence each partner contributes to the relationship.

Parental bonding

Attachment

Parental bonds often help children form their identity.

In 1958, British developmental psychologist John Bowlby published the paper "the Nature of the Child's Tie to his Mother," in which the precursory concepts of "attachment theory" were developed. This included the development of the concept of the affectional bond, which is based on the universal tendency for humans to attach, i.e. to seek closeness to another person and to feel secure when that person is present. Attachment theory has some of its origins in the observation of and experiments with animals, but is also based on observations of children who had missed typical experiences of adult care. Much of the early research on attachment in humans was done by John Bowlby and his associates. Bowlby proposed that babies have an inbuilt need from birth to make emotional attachments, i.e. bonds, because this increases the chances of survival by ensuring that they receive the care they need.[6][7][8] Bowlby did not describe mutuality in attachment. He stated that attachment by mother was a pathological inversion and described only behaviors of the infant. Many developmental specialists elaborated Bowlby's ethological observations. However, neither Bowlby's proximity seeking (not possible for human infants prior to walking) nor subsequent descriptions of caregiver–infant mutuality with emotional availability and synchrony with emotional modulation include the enduring motivation of attachment into adult life. The enduring motivation is the desire to control a pleasantly surprising transformation that is the route of belief in effectiveness by humans.[citation needed] This motivation accounts for curiosity and intellectual growth of language, mathematics and logic, all of which have an emotional base of security.[9]

Maternal bonding