Non-monogamy
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Non-monogamy and polyamory |
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It has been suggested that this article be merged with Consensual non-monogamy. (Discuss) Proposed since March 2024. |
Non-monogamy (or nonmonogamy) is an
More specifically, "nonmonogamy" indicates forms of
Terminology
Many terms for non-monogamous practices are vague, being based on criteria such as "
Polyamory is based on the preferences of the participants rather than social custom or established precedent. There is no one 'right' way to engage in non-monogamy (although there are widely agreed on 'wrong' ways).[10][11] Because of this, the terms for the various kinds of relationships can be vague and sometimes interchangeable. but there are some distinctions that are worth defining. For example, swingers may intentionally avoid emotional and social connection to those—other than their primary partner—with whom they have sex, so may or may not be polyamorous but are non-monogamous.[12]
Some useful terms are Metamour or Meta, the common term for a person with whom a partner is shared, V-Structure, one person is equally involved with two partners,
Forms of non-monogamy are varied. They include a
It is sometimes confused with polyamory, referring to when participants have multiple romantic partners[36][37] It comes in various forms, such as hierarchical polyamory, where there is a primary romantic relationship with all other relationships being secondary to it, kitchen table polyamory which refers to people are expected to know one another and be comfortable in each others' company,[38][39] and parallel polyamory, with relationships between people who are kept separately, all may be aware of each other, but are not expected to be friends.[40] There is also group marriage, where several people form a single familial unit and each person considered to be married to all other members. Line families are a form of group marriage intended to outlive its original members by ongoing addition of new spouses[41] and poly families, which is similar to group marriage, but some members may not consider themselves married to all other members.[42]
Favorable preexisting conditions before non-monogamy
Michael Shernoff cites two studies in his report on same-sex couples considering non-monogamy.[43] Morin (1999) stated that a couple has a very good chance of adjusting to non-exclusivity if at least some of the following conditions exist. This includes both partners wanting their relationship to remain primary, the couple having an established reservoir of good will, and a minimum of lingering resentments from past hurts and betrayals.[43] Other conditions include the partners in agreement on the question of monogamy/non-monogamy and the partners feeling similarly powerful and autonomous. Additionally, Green and Mitchell (2002) stated that direct discussion of the following issues can provide the basis for honest and important conversations, including openness versus secrecy, volition and equality versus coercion and inequality.[43] Other issues include clarity and specificity of agreements versus confusion/vagueness, honoring keeping agreements versus violating them, and how each partner views non-monogamy. According to Shernoff,[43] if the matter is discussed with a third party, such as a therapist, the task of the therapist is to "engage couples in conversations that let them decide for themselves whether sexual exclusivity or non-exclusivity is functional or dysfunctional for the relationship."
Public health and morality
The concepts of monogamy and marriage have been strongly intertwined for centuries, and in English-language dictionaries one is often used to define the other, as when "monogamy" is "being married to one person at a time."[44][45][46] A common antonym is polygamy, meaning to have more than one spouse at one time.[47] As a result, monogamy is deeply entrenched within many religions, and in social regulations and law, and exceptions are condemned as incursions on both morality and public health.
To some, the term non-monogamy semantically implies that monogamy is the norm, with other forms of relational intimacy being deviant and therefore somehow unhealthy or immoral.[48] This concern over sexually transmitted diseases is despite the common practice of regular testing and sharing of recent test results prior to engaging in sexual activity.
It is often assumed that people who participate in non-monogamous sexual relationships have a higher rate of STIs. Despite reporting a higher number of sexual partners, research suggests that the risk of transmitting STIs is no higher than they are among the monogamous population.[49] This is because the non-monogamous community is more likely to be regularly tested and more open about their results.[citation needed] The stigma of receiving a positive result is diminished, resulting in better treatment options and fewer people who are unwittingly transmitting the disease because they were not told by the person who gave it to them.
See also
- Plaçage
- Sexual revolution
- Adultery
- Family: the web series
- Consensual non-monogamy
- Group sex
- List of polyamorists
- List of polyamorous characters in fiction
- Polyday
- Romantic orientation
- Sociosexual orientation
- The Four Loves (Book)
References
- ^ Cf. "Monogamy" in Britannica World Language Dictionary, R.C. Preble (ed.), Oxford-London 1962, p. 1275:1. The practice or principle of marrying only once. opp. to digamy now rare 2. The condition, rule or custom of being married to only one person at a time (opp. to polygamy or bigamy) 1708. 3. Zool. The habit of living in pairs, or having only one mate; The same text repeats The Shorter Oxford English Dictionary, W. Little, H.W. Fowler, J. Coulson (ed.), C.T. Onions (rev. & ed.,) Oxford 1969, 3rd edition, vol.1, p.1275; OED Online. March 2010. Oxford University Press. 23 Jun. 2010 Cf. Monogamy Archived 2015-06-23 at the Wayback Machine in Merriam-Webster Dictionary
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- ^ Ballard, Jamie (January 31, 2020). "Millennials are less likely to want a monogamous relationship". YouGov. Archived from the original on November 3, 2020. Retrieved December 24, 2020.
- ^ Nyami, Faith (February 11, 2018). "Cleric: Christian men can marry more than one wife". Daily Nation. Archived from the original on April 4, 2018. Retrieved December 24, 2020.
- ^ Mamdani, Zehra (February 28, 2008). "Idaho Evangelical Christian polygamists use Internet to meet potential spouses". Deseret News. Archived from the original on December 25, 2020. Retrieved December 24, 2020.
- ^ Sheff, Elisabeth A. (July 22, 2014). "7 Different Kinds of Non-Monogamy". Psychology Today. Archived from the original on December 25, 2020. Retrieved December 24, 2020.
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- ^ Bote, Joshua (February 14, 2020). "What you need to know about polyamory — including throuples — but were too afraid to ask". USA Today. Archived from the original on July 4, 2020. Retrieved December 24, 2020.
- ^ Burgum, Becky (June 7, 2020). "Polyamorous Relationships: A Definition of Polyamory, How It Works And Why It's Not All About Sex". Elle. Archived from the original on July 6, 2020. Retrieved December 24, 2020.
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- ^ Bergstrand, Curtis; Blevins Williams, Jennifer (October 10, 2000). "Today's Alternative Marriage Styles: The Case of Swingers". Electronic Journal of Human Sexuality. 3. Retrieved December 24, 2020.
- ^ Lane, S. Nicole (April 21, 2020). "Polyamory during a pandemic". Chicago Reader. Archived from the original on April 30, 2020. Retrieved December 24, 2020.
- ^ Harper, Douglas (ed.). "Polygamy". Online Etymology Dictionary. Archived from the original on 1 February 2016. Retrieved December 24, 2020.
- ^ Barash, David P. (March 26, 2016). "7 Different Kinds of Non-Monogamy". Psychology Today. Archived from the original on December 25, 2020. Retrieved December 24, 2020.
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- ^ "Polygyny -- Definition of Polygyny at MerriamWebster". Merriam-Webster. 2020. Archived from the original on March 11, 2018. Retrieved December 24, 2020.
- ^ Clignet, R., Many Wives, Many Powers, Northwestern University Press, Evanston (1970), p. 17.
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- ^ McCullough, Derek; Hall, David S. (27 February 2003). "Polyamory - What it is and what it isn't". Electronic Journal of Human Sexuality. 6.
- ^ Struyk, Tara (September 15, 2020). "7 Polyamorous Relationship Myths It's Time to Stop Believing". Glamour. Archived from the original on March 8, 2020. Retrieved December 24, 2020.
- ^ "Parallel Polyamory, Kitchen Table Polyamory, and Knowing the Details or Not". Poly.Land. April 3, 2018. Archived from the original on September 29, 2019. Retrieved May 22, 2020.
- ^ Kassel, Gabrielle (October 30, 2020). "What To Know About Vee Relationships, the Polyamorous Structure Some People Swear By". Well + Good. Archived from the original on November 1, 2020. Retrieved December 24, 2020.
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