Talk:Hollaback Girl/GA1

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Reviewer: MarioSoulTruthFan (talk · contribs) 23:10, 30 June 2016 (UTC)[reply]


Hello, I'm MarioSoulTruthFan and I'll be reviewing this article in the next couple of days. MarioSoulTruthFan (talk) 23:10, 30 June 2016 (UTC)[reply]

Infobox

  • Needs alt
 Done
  • How do you know the release date?
  • How do you know when and where was recorded?

Lead

  • Needs to mention music video
 Done
  • Mention other charts for nations where it reached the top ten but didn't go number one
 Done
  • Meetion Certifications (highest available, 2 will be enough)
 Done
  • Performances
 Done
  • ""Hollaback Girl" received several award nominations, including Best Female Pop Vocal Performance and Record of the Year at the 48th Grammy Awards..." → I don't understand if it won any or not?
 Done
  • "yet it divided pop music critics". → needs to be elaborated.
 Done
  • After all these changes perhaps divided the lead in 3 paragraphs.
 Done

Writing and inspiration

  • "Stefani had worked with The Neptunes (Pharrell Williams and Chad Hugo) during the early stages of writing Love. Angel. Music. Baby.; however, a case of writer's block resulted in reportedly uninspired collaborations" → you need to make this sentence about the song itself, because the citation is titled "Road To The Grammys: The Making Of Gwen Stefani's 'Hollaback Girl'"
 Done
  • The quote boxes are way to small, remove them. Use the sentences to make another paragraph.
 Done

Composition

  • "a moderately fast song" → like an uptempo? How do you even kow that? The reference provided is not reliable.
 Done Added reliable source with the same information. Carbrera (talk) 23:10, 6 September 2016 (UTC)[reply]
  • "Most of the harmonic content of the song revolves around a two-chord alternation which music theorists may regard as an L (leading tone) transformation, in which the root of the major chord is lowered by a half-step to form a second inversion minor chord on the third scale degree (see image to right), a slight tonicization of B major, but resolving back to D♯ minor by having the same A, a perfect fourth down from D♯. This stepwise motion between B and A♯ highlights this chord change. It is in verse-chorus form with a bridge before the fourth and final chorus" → needs reference
  • Remove the "riff and chord pattern" sample and move the sample of the song in the infobox to this section and add an appropriate description.
 Done

Critical reception

  • "moronic and embarrassingly tuneless. I'd quote the lyrics, but they're so bad, I almost feel sorry for her. A 35-year-old woman singing about pom-poms and 'talking shit' in high school betrays such a delusional self-image that it's hard not to be taken aback. And on top of that, The Neptunes' beats are clunky and the production is senselessly bombastic" → use your own words along with some parts of this quote.
  • You need more reviews talking just about the song itself.

Commercial performance

  • solicited to radio" → sent to the radio. Reference?
 Done I couldn't find a reliable source so I removed it altogether. Carbrera (talk) 22:59, 6 September 2016 (UTC)[reply]
  • These pictures have nothing to do with the commercial performance of the song, please use one of them in the section "Live Performances" and remove the other. The picture in the mention section is disrupting the following section, so beware of it's size, reduce if necessary.
 Done One has been removed and the other has been moved. Carbrera (talk) 23:12, 6 September 2016 (UTC)[reply]
  • "although the music video had been released two weeks earlier, on March 21" → wrong section
 Done
  • "was a small success" → remove
 Done
  • "The number of sales required to qualify for gold and platinum discs was lower for digital singles prior to August 2006. The thresholds were 100,000 units (gold) and 200,000 units (platinum), reflecting an increase in digital downloads" → Should be in a note at the bottom.
 Done
  • "The song reached number one on both the Hot Digital Songs and Hot Digital Tracks charts concurrently," → remove
 Done
  • "The single was largely successful across Europe, reaching the top five in Austria, Denmark, Germany, and Ireland, and the top 10 in Belgium, Finland, Italy, the Netherlands, Norway, Sweden, and Switzerland." → no need for so many countries, sounds like a supermarket list, chose a couple of those, 2 from the top 5 and three from the top 10 and develop the process.

Music video

  • "To visualize the song's bridge, the Harajuku Girls spell the word "bananas" with cue cards. The video ends with a close-up frame of Stefani with her arms in the air" → reference
 Done Like I said in your most recent GA review, I do not believe a reference is needed to demonstrate information for a visual, as long as what's being described can be confirmed while watching the said video. Carbrera (talk) 17:26, 3 August 2016 (UTC)[reply]
  • "Eventually, the car was sold on eBay" → The car was, eventually, sold on eBay.
 Done
  • Could use reviews regarding the video.

Live performances

  • "Stefani has performed "Hollaback Girl" on several occasions, including on two of her concert tours, in addition to several live appearances". → you are saying the same thing twice or not, that sentence between commas is asking this hard to understand. By the way several live performances such as?
 Done I reworded this for additional clarification. Carbrera (talk) 17:00, 3 August 2016 (UTC)[reply]
  • "2007 world tour for her sophomore studio album The Sweet Escape (2006)" → At the The Sweet Escape Tour (2007), which promoted her sophomore album The Sweet Escape.
 Done
  • "she performed the song in the middle of the show; for the performance, she wore sparkly red shorts and an argyle jacket" → she performed the song in the middle of the show wearing a sparkly red shorts and an argyle jacket
 Done
  • she performed the track in May 2014 alongside Williams → she sung the track in May 2014 alongside Williams,
 Done
  • "The performance prompted the song to enter the Billboard Pop Digital Songs component chart, where it re-entered at number thirty-four". → I'm not sure if this is the right section.
 Done I think that this would be much better here than in the "Commercial section"; here we have explanation why it re-entered: because of a performance 9 years after the song's initial release. Wouldn't it kinda stick out like a sore thumb elsewhere? Carbrera (talk) 17:00, 3 August 2016 (UTC)[reply]
  • You use to many times the word "performance" → replace i every now and then for sung live, the single was performed/sung live and others....
 Done I think I took care of this now... Carbrera (talk) 17:00, 3 August 2016 (UTC)[reply]

Track listings

  • Use {{
    spaced ndash
    }}     so there is space on both sides.
 Done
  • 2 columns
 Done

Remixes

  • "whose debut album Kanal produced, and appears as a single on iTunes, on the CD single for "Cool", and on the bonus CD of the deluxe edition of Love. Angel. Music. Baby." → I believe Kanal is an album so needs Kanal, besides this sentence is so long that is confusing to read, make two sentences out of this one.
 Done Actually, "Kanal" is not an album, but I did break it up into smaller sentences like you originally suggested.

Credits and personnel

  • Use {{
    spaced ndash
    }}     so there is space on both sides.
 Done
  • 2 columns?
 Done

Charts

Weekly charts

  • Remove the "US Pop Digital Songs", since it's a component chart and the song peaked at number one in Pop 100.
 Done

Year-end charts

  • Fine.
 Done

Decade-end charts

  • Same "width" as year-end charts.
 Done Can't change the width, but I changed it so it's the same format as year-end. Carbrera (talk) 16:48, 3 August 2016 (UTC)[reply]

Certifications

  • Fine
 Done
  • Perhaps a side note of the certification have changed.
Perhaps you could clarify what you mean by this? Carbrera (talk) 16:53, 3 August 2016 (UTC)[reply]
(The number of sales required to qualify for gold and platinum discs was lower for digital singles prior to August 2006. The thresholds were 100,000 units (gold) and 200,000 units (platinum), reflecting an increase in digital downloads.) → this should be as a side note, besides it's a mastertone.
 Done

See also

  • Fine
 Done

References

You have several issues here:

References are not well formatted or some unreliable

  • "robertchristgau.com" → Robert Christgau
 Done Fixed.
  • "michaelgeist.ca" → Michael Geist.
 Done Fixed.
  • MTV (Viacom). → MTV Viacom Media Network
 Done Fixed.
  • If you are planning to take this to FA, I would suggest to add both Work and Publisher to the references, some have others don't.
 Done SnapSnap took care of this. Thanks for the suggestion.
  • mvdbase.com. → unreliable
  • ATRL is a music forum → can't use that.
  • "Top40-Charts.com" → unreliable
 Done Fixed.
  • "8notes" → unreliable
 Done Fixed.
  • "IMCDb" → unreliable
  • "familyguyquotes.com" → fansite
 Done Fixed.
  • "Nodoubtweb" → fansite and it's dead

External links

  • Fine
 Done

Overall GA review

@Carbrera: this article needs some serious work, one week granted. Good luck! MarioSoulTruthFan (talk) 12:27, 6 July 2016 (UTC)[reply]

Hey! Thanks for the review as always. I will be out of the country for the next two weeks, starting later tonight, and would appreciate if you granted more time for me to address the issues mentioned in this review. Thank you. Carbrera (talk) 02:02, 8 July 2016 (UTC).[reply]
Fine by me. MarioSoulTruthFan (talk) 11:55, 8 July 2016 (UTC)[reply]
I will be fixing this within the next 24 hours. Thanks for the extension. Carbrera (talk) 23:46, 23 July 2016 (UTC)[reply]
MarioSoulTruthFan, Carbrera, where does this nomination stand? The note field attached to it reads Reviewer and nominator agreed to address the article by the end of the month; since it was added on July 8, I assume MarioSoulTruthFan was aiming for July 31. Carbrera made a bunch of edits on August 3. What is left to be addressed? Thanks. BlueMoonset (talk) 14:55, 16 August 2016 (UTC)[reply]
@BlueMoonset: I have been out of town for the last couple of weeks. He missed the first topics and failed to correct the websites. I will warn Carbrera.
@Carbrera: You must address the final issues, otherwise I will fail this article. You have one week, on September 3, 2016 if nothing has been done I will fail the article. Best regards, 17:18, 27 August 2016 (UTC).[reply]
@Carbrera:; @MarioSoulTruthFan: This nomination should be failed if the nominator won't get the comments responded. This article has been placed on hold since 30 June, and now we're in September. Best, Cartoon network freak (talk) 15:02, 6 September 2016 (UTC)[reply]
@Carbrera: I know you have been working on the article and it's close to GA status. Nevertheless I will have to fail it. Its' been open for over 3 months, please address the final issues, re-nominate it again with more two or three fixes it will pass, I would advise a revision by GOCE. However, take it with the next nominator. I'm sorry. MarioSoulTruthFan (talk) 16:34, 7 September 2016 (UTC)[reply]
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