Template:Did you know nominations/I've Seen All I Need to See: Difference between revisions

I've Seen All I Need to See

• ... that American band the Body's album I've Seen All I Need to See opens with a reading of Scottish poet Douglas Dunn's poem "The Kaleidoscope", which he wrote in 1981? Source: [1]

• Reviewed: Babakale Castle

Created by Ashleyyoursmile (talk). Self-nominated at 13:45, 8 February 2021 (UTC).

• New article, long enough, well-sourced and neutrally written, no copyvio detected, interesting hook. Some comments: 1) The source says that Dunn's wife died in 1981 but doesn't confirm that the poem was written that year. If it was published in his 1985 collection Elegies (see this but please confirm - I haven't looked into it too much) then the hook needs to be changed, either with the updated year or by removing the year. 2) Should "the" in "the Body" be capitalized, like it is in the The Body (band) article? If so, it should be corrected throughout the article as well. 3) "which he wrote in 1981" can be condensed a bit, I think. Perhaps something like "...with a reading of the 1981(?) poem 'The Kaleidoscope' by Scottish poet Douglas Dunn?" Best, DanCherek (talk) 06:37, 11 February 2021 (UTC)
  • @Ashleyyoursmile: One more thing—the Metacritic score dropped slightly to 80/100, which I believe moves it barely into "generally favorable reviews" territory. DanCherek (talk) 01:10, 12 February 2021 (UTC)
• Note: Ashleyyoursmile wasn't able to sign additional edits to this template for some reason, so I'm copying the rest of our discussion from my talk page (link to discussion). —DanCherek (talk) 14:10, 12 February 2021 (UTC)

I'll just post the changes below. To the three points you raised in the review:

1) That's a good catch, I didn't see it that way, thanks for correcting.

2) Regarding the name of the band in the hook, if you see Please Please Me and Goats Head Soup, you'll find the band titles have used "the" and not "The" in the middle of the sentence.

3) Agreed that it can be condensed, so here's an alternate hook:

• ALT 1: ... that American band the Body's album I've Seen All I Need to See opens with a reading of the 1981 poem "The Kaleidoscope" by Scottish poet Douglas Dunn? Source: [2] Ashleyyoursmile! 13:09, 12 February 2021 (UTC)

@Ashleyyoursmile: That all looks good, thanks! This is super close. The remaining thing I'd mentioned was whether the poem was actually written in 1981 (the Pitchfork source says his wife died in 1981 and he wrote the poem sometime after that). The article is fine, but I would either drop the year from the hook, or add the information about Elegies to the article and change the hook year to 1985. Does that make sense? DanCherek (talk) 13:27, 12 February 2021 (UTC)

Right, I missed that part. I think the year should be dropped since this source doesn't explicitly mention that "The Kaleidoscope" is a part of the Elegies. So here's the final hook:

• ALT 1: ... that American band the Body's album I've Seen All I Need to See opens with a reading of the poem "The Kaleidoscope" by Scottish poet Douglas Dunn? Source: [3]

Thank you very much for the time you've devoted in reviewing this. --Ashleyyoursmile! 13:38, 12 February 2021 (UTC)

• Final ALT 1 hook is good to go, and QPQ done. DanCherek (talk) 14:10, 12 February 2021 (UTC)