Talk:USS Curlew (1862)/GA1

Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch

Reviewer: Pickersgill-Cunliffe (talk · contribs) 20:13, 8 May 2022 (UTC)[reply]

Will take a look shortly. Pickersgill-Cunliffe (talk) 20:13, 8 May 2022 (UTC)[reply]

Prelim

• No duplicated links
• No images to check. Suggest adding at least one appropriate one
• No edit wars
• Earwig reports no copyvio - only pings the names of books

Lede and infobox

• "Built in 1862 in Pennsylvania.." suggest saying that she was built as a civilian vessel to make that a little clearer
  • Done
• The lede begins by saying that the stern-wheel steamer saw service in the ACW, but would it not be more correct to say it was the converted tinclad gunboat that saw the ACW service?
  • It was still a stern-wheel steamer as a gunboat; they left the machinery and just slapped some light armor on it and made whatever adjustments were required to mount cannon. Hog Farm _Talk 19:59, 13 May 2022 (UTC)[reply]
• The date for the June 2 "minor action" is not in main text
  • I am really truly unsure of why I put that in there or where I got the June date from; corrected
• "On June 2, 1863..." this sentence is reeaally long
  • Split
• Link decommissioned
  • Linked
• Infobox says launched in 1862 but body only says constructed; not exactly the same thing
  • Removed from infobox
• "Sold, 17 August 1865" date does not follow MDY
  • Done
• Type should probable include her conversion to a gunboat
  • Added

Saw your talk page message. Please don't feel like you have to get on this right now, I'm happy to continue writing up comments and for you to get to them whenever you feel ready. Pickersgill-Cunliffe (talk) 13:59, 11 May 2022 (UTC)[reply]

I'm back now; I should be able to get to these now. Hog Farm _Talk 13:31, 18 May 2022 (UTC)[reply]

Construction and characteristics

• Any idea what Florence was meant for?
  • Not that I've seen
• Suggest linking knots
  • Done, although the only way I know how to do it in the template also linked mph and km/h
• "She was initially armed with eight 24-pounder howitzers as of February 1863"
  • Done
• "was also armed" wording suggests this was an addition to her armament rather than a replacement?
  • I've tried to clarify
• "at another point" is there no date?
  • Not in Silverstone, and I'm not sure exactly where he got it from
• If there is no link suggest providing a description/explanation for "tinclad"
  • Glossed
• "assigned the number 12" what type of number are we talking here? identification?
  • It appears to be identification. Added.
• "She was considered to be a ship of the fourth-rate" this, to me, is incredibly strange. The rate system as I know it suggests that this means Curlew had a broadside of between 40 and 60 guns, which she clearly didn't. Is "fourth-rate" in the sense of the linked article actually what the Americans meant here?
  • Removed as I can't figure out what it means either
• Hentig was in command when Curlew was commissioned, so suggest moving his introduction to the commissioning to avoid wording suggesting that he was a slightly later appointee
  • Done

Service history

• " left Cairo, Illinois" was this where she was commissioned/converted?
  • Unclear. I found a semi-monthly report from Admiral Porter that stated that she was at Cairo awaiting a crew, but it's not clear if that's where the conversion work in particular took place
• Repeating here that the minor action is only dated in the lede and not main text
  • Fixed now
• What was the aim of the minor action? a little more context would be useful if possible
  • Added, a tiny punitive action against some Confederates who had shot up a Union transport
• If, as the lede says, the minor action was in June, then the chronology is out of whack here with the later May events
  • Lead was in error
    • I found where I've gotten the June 2 date from, so I've readded it and fixed the chronology
• "of an acting"
  • Corrected
• Link acting at first instance
  • Done
• "Hentig had been arrested" interesting! do we know why?
  • Best I can find is a report stating I have had but three cases reported to me for trespassing within the last year - Acting Masters Hentig, Sinclair, and Shaw. The former two were dismissed, and the latter resigned. The context is an official report denying allegations of "depredations committed by Eastern officers commanding tinclads" so it's a bit unclear if "trespassing" is met to be a reference to the specific crime or a general reference to misdeeds.
• "multi-vessel expedition" as there doesn't seem to be an article about this, suggest naming some or all of the other ships involved to provide some more information for the reader
  • It's not going to be a notable action (a minor raid really), and there were about five or so other vessels so I'm not sure it's really due weight to list them all. I could add the Union commander (Thomas Oliver Selfridge Jr.).
• "captured two steamers, destroyed two others" are these military or civilian vessels? if possible say which river these captures/actions took place in, as you name quite a few!
  • Unclear if it's military or civilian or civilian in military use. I've added the rivers the captures took place in.
• When did the expedition end?
  • I've clarified that the length of this was about a week in mid-July
• "Acting Ensign Turner" don't repeat his rank
  • Done
• "killed by a provost marshal" did any of Curlew's commanders not have a strange fate? Again I'd love to know more?!
  • The Union official records preserve a letter from a Lieutenant Commander Greer to David Dixon Porter announcing the matter by cryptically stating He was killed by Major McKee, provost-marshal of this port (apparently referring to Natchez, Mississippi). The letter references "a copy of the proceedings of a committee of investigation upon the matter" but the committee's proceedings don't seem to have been preserved that I can find.
• "a sharp action" this is a bit of an opinion
  • Removed
• "the incident" more of an action than an incident surely!
  • Reworded
• "in trouble" suggest replacing this with a description of what they were fighting
  • Clarified
• Link decommissioned again
  • Linked

References

• Suggest splitting ref #8 to better illustrate which part of the sentence is cited to which of the (very separate) page numbers
  • Done
• Ref #12 should be "pp. IV-129–IV-130." I believe (strange page numbers though, I had to look to see those were real!)
  • Done
• Not related to the refs, but the "see also" link doesn't seem to be very useful, as it just links to more links about vague US ships
  • Removed. Before I started working on it, the article also felt the need to include steamboat as a see also link.

@Hog Farm: That's all I have for now, will await your replies. Pickersgill-Cunliffe (talk) 17:59, 19 May 2022 (UTC)[reply]

@Pickersgill-Cunliffe: - I've addressed all of the first pass; sorry it took so long. Starting Monday I'll be out of town on a multi-day work trip and won't have access to print books (mainly just Silverstone for this one) so replies to some follow-ups may be delayed. Hog Farm _Talk 18:00, 21 May 2022 (UTC)[reply]

@Hog Farm: No problem, this isn't a long article so the follow up is really very short. In fact I've taken the opportunity to do some very minor copy editing myself to save time. Hopefully you won't disagree with any of it, but revert at your will. I agree that adding Selfridge (with accompanying rank) to the river expedition is a good compromise, and leave that for you as my final point here. Pickersgill-Cunliffe (talk) 18:14, 21 May 2022 (UTC)[reply]

@Pickersgill-Cunliffe: - I've added the mention of Selfridge as well as his rank. Hog Farm _Talk 21:06, 21 May 2022 (UTC)[reply]

Happy to pass this article as satisfying the GA criteria. Pickersgill-Cunliffe (talk) 21:43, 21 May 2022 (UTC)[reply]