Wikipedia:Requests for feedback/Archive/19

This page is an archive. Do not edit the contents of this page. Please direct any additional comments to the current main page.

{{done}} Closeable, I guess. Dori ❦ (Talk ❖ Contribs ❖ Review) ❦ 04:04, 16 February 2010 (UTC)

Tony Samara article on my user page: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Sud_Ram/Tony_Samara

This article has been deleted in the past but new information has come to light since then and more sources are available so I have rewritten and re-sourced the article to fit - IMHO - Wikipedia's standards.

Please let me know if you agree that this is acceptable or not.

Peace Sud Ram (talk) 19:41, 11 February 2010 (UTC)

The article (at

verifiable reliable sources—which is required for an article, and particularly, for a biography. Dori ❦ (Talk ❖ Contribs ❖ Review

) ❦ 19:50, 11 February 2010 (UTC)

Thanks for the feedback, however I understood that mainstream European media and a published biography of the subject would qualify as third party reliable sources or have I misunderstood? I have read the guidelines but don't seem to find a contradiction. Sud Ram (talk) 07:25, 12 February 2010 (UTC)

There are currently nine references for the article. Of those:

• Four are to tonysamara.org, the web site of the article's subject
• One is to samaramultimedia.net, another site affiliated with the article's subject
• One is to a web page that sells a book by the article's subject
• One is to YouTube, which isn't considered a
  reliable source
• One is to a self-published book that came out last week
• One is to sabado.pt:
  • Searching for "Samara" finds no results on that page
  • Searching for "Samara" finds no results on that site
  • Google is not able to find any pages on that site that contain both "Tony" and "Samara"

Given the above, we're left with nothing.

When I look for sources myself:

• Google News Archive knows of three people named "Tony Samara", none of whom appear to be your shaman
• Google Books doesn't have much, either. This book mentions him as head of a new religious movement, but it's just one in a list of many new religious movements.

Basically, you've got no solid sourcing on this article because there aren't any good sources to be found. Some day you might, but that day is not now. Dori ❦ (Talk ❖ Contribs ❖ Review) ❦ 08:38, 12 February 2010 (UTC)

Thanks Dori for helping out. Sabado's website and print contents are separate, as you will find with a lot of media in Europe so maybe I should link to a PDF of the printed article? The YouTube link of the Croatian TV Show isn't the source itself, it's a reproduction of the program that was featured on HRT 2, the Croatian national television station (which is wikilinked now and linked in the reference).

As to the biography, it's recent and on-demand publishing, not self-published by the subject.

Regarding the Google News Archive, on the page of results of your search, the link in Slovenian is about this same Tony Samara. Which in its turn links to the the national Slovenian TV station's website

RTV Slovenija

regarding a retreat that was done in Pasman, Croatia.

I'm trying to address your points and hope this answers them. Sud Ram (talk) 11:43, 12 February 2010 (UTC)

To address your points:

• No, a PDF of the Sabado article wouldn't help; partly because WP would have to take your word for it being an accurate copy (see
  WP:GNG
  .
• On-demand printers will happily print self-published books, and in this case, that's what the biography is. Don't confuse printing with publishing.
• YouTube isn't a reliable source, no matter where the video came from.
• Having been on Slovenian TV once still doesn't bring him close enough to qualify under
  WP:GNG or any of the other notability criteria. Dori ❦ (Talk ❖ Contribs ❖ Review
  ) ❦ 20:02, 12 February 2010 (UTC)

Ok, thanks for your time. Sud Ram (talk) 07:36, 13 February 2010 (UTC)

{{Done}} – ukexpat (talk) 19:40, 17 February 2010 (UTC)

A simple redirect to an existing page Nicholas Crane

--Impeachable (talk) 16:16, 17 February 2010 (UTC)

You don't really need feedback for that. I will move it and edit it per redirect formatting. – ukexpat (talk) 16:23, 17 February 2010 (UTC)

True - but as I'm not yet confirmed I couldn't take it any further on my own anyway. Thanks Impeachable (talk) 17:26, 17 February 2010 (UTC)

{{Done}} - reviewed and in mainspace. – ukexpat (talk) 16:48, 24 February 2010 (UTC)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/ECamp

Gigiflyer (talk) 08:22, 31 December 2009 (UTC)

Page has been deleted by someone other than myself. --NortyNort (talk) 22:59, 5 January 2010 (UTC)

{{Done}} – ukexpat (talk) 16:58, 24 February 2010 (UTC)

Dear Sir/Madam, I would like to ask for some feedback on the creation of a new article - True North Productions - submitted today. The article is about a television production company and it's the first time I have created an article in this way and it would be useful to confirm that everything is in order. Best Wishes, Glyn Middleton —Preceding unsigned comment added by Truenorthglyn (talk • contribs) 13:46, 1 January 2010 (UTC)

I've just had a look at this article and the most glaring problem at the moment is that there are currently four inline citations in the article that do not support the information given. They are citations directing to a specific webpage and in each case, the webpage does not contain the facts that the refs are supposed to support. For instance, the article says that programmes made by True North Productions "have so far been screened in 186 countries." However, the ref that follows this statement directs to a web page and nowhere on that webpage does it state that this the correct number of countries. It's not enough to link to a website which may contain the relevant info, the inline refs should link to the specific page where the information you're citing can easily be found. Consequently, I've tagged this article with multiple "failed verification" tags and a "citecheck" banner at the top. These should only be removed when this problem is fixed. There's also the possibility of a conflict of interest with this article but as long as you're careful that what you write isn't biased, it should be OK. Post a message on my talk page (click the word "talk" in my signature) if you want any further help or advice with this article. --Kohoutek1138 (talk) 15:46, 2 January 2010 (UTC)

{{Done}} - deleted as a copyvio. – ukexpat (talk) 17:03, 24 February 2010 (UTC)

I wrote an entry on the Long Island based indie rock band Aunt Ange with most of the information taken from their website. As this is my first article for wikipedia, I was worried that I might not have enough references. Thanks for your help!

best,

Rich (RexManningDay (talk) 21:26, 1 January 2010 (UTC))

The subject does not seem to meet Wikipedia's

copyrighted material policy. The article should be deleted in its current form and recreated if and when the subject can be verified to meet the notability standards. ^Bongo_matic

21:36, 1 January 2010 (UTC)

cirumference of an oval

{{Done}} - no response from requester. – ukexpat (talk) 17:07, 24 February 2010 (UTC)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Whats_inside_the_light_bulb%3F/new_article_name_here It's my first article tell me what you think --Whats inside the light bulb? (talk) 02:35, 2 January 2010 (UTC)

Although interesting, I am not sure if this is encyclopedic.--NortyNort (talk) 23:03, 5 January 2010 (UTC)

Well, you need to give it some structure, and you need to watch spelling errors (it's vertical and horizontal, not virtical and horizantal). also, this would probably be better as part of a bigger article on computing circumferences...

for structure, what you should do is write out an introductory paragraph - basically tell us what the article is about, and then start a new section where you tell us how to do it. look at

the manual of style to get an idea of what the page should look like. --Ludwigs2

23:28, 5 January 2010 (UTC)

Wikipedia is

Wikipedia's inclusion criteria. – ukexpat (talk

) 17:05, 24 February 2010 (UTC)

Cynthia Cozette Lee

{{Done}} - now sourced and in mainspace. – ukexpat (talk) 17:20, 24 February 2010 (UTC)

) 02:55, 2 January 2010 (UTC)

While Cozette sounds like a great musician, the article does not yet demonstrate her

general notability guideline. If the article is unable to meet that guideline, it may meet more specific, music related notability guidelines on Wikipedia:Notability (music)

. If your article is nominated for deletion, be prepared to defend your article by demonstrating how it meets at least one notability guideline.

The article also has a lot of information but no references. Wikipedia has a policy against

WP:Referencing for beginners

. The latter part of the article looks like a resume- please convert this to prose.

Hope that helps. If you have questions, contact me by clicking the pink "talk". Liqudluck✽talk 06:52, 3 January 2010 (UTC)

{{Done}} - in mainspace with cited refs. – ukexpat (talk) 18:02, 24 February 2010 (UTC)

Hi, this is my first article for wikipedia. Would welcome any feedback/contributions from you more experienced contributors.

Many thanks. --Martlayton (talk) 22:23, 2 January 2010 (UTC)

Nice start. What you'll need to do is add inline references to the supporting material- please read

WP:Referencing for beginners. References should include at least the resource's author, publisher, and access date. The preferred way and, in my opinion, the easiest way of citing accurately is by using citation templates

.

It may be worth adding the

Template:Infobox Legislation. Leave unapplicable fields blank and they won't show up. Let me know on my talk page if you have further questions (click "talk" at the end of my signature). Liqudluck✽talk

01:07, 3 January 2010 (UTC)

Madison, Sirius/XM Satellite Radio DJ

{{Done}}} - article appears top have been deleted. – ukexpat (talk) 18:04, 24 February 2010 (UTC)

Madison, Sirius/XM Satellite Radio DJ

I was shocked to find out that my favorite radio DJ didn't have a wikipedia page when most of her fellow Sirius Radio co-workers do. I decided to dig up some sources about her and start a wiki page on her behalf. I'm looking forward to getting it live!

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Jami0821/Madison

Jami0821 (talk) 02:36, 3 January 2010 (UTC) Jami Gibbs 1/2/10

Madison Radio DJ

• She is pleasant on the eyes in that picture but it appears to be a copyright violation. Is Myspace actually raeleased under Creative Commons or did you just tag it as so?
• The citations are not formatted.
  Wikipedia:Referencing for beginners
  might help.
• Myspace as an external link is normally to be avoided (
  WP:ELNO
  ).
• Wikipedia:Layout
  is also a must for how to handle the different sections.
• "Or a hooker. She is Jewish" is just plain weird. I assume they are not related but you took something that should be quoted (and put in context for the reader) and plopped religion next to it.
• Add an infobox
• Find more sources. Any reviews or other independent write ups in the press?
• It might need a new title. Madison(DJ/entertainer/something like that)

Cptnono (talk) 11:14, 4 January 2010 (UTC)

{{Done}} - in mainspace. – ukexpat (talk) 18:12, 24 February 2010 (UTC)

The_Inquisition_(underground_newspaper) User:Smalljones/Inquisition_(underground_newspaper) This article will complete a referenced but not existent article on this briefly lived but significant underground newspaper in Charlotte, NC. Reliable references and links to collected copies are included in the article. Smalljones (talk) 22:06, 3 January 2010 (UTC)

{{Done}} - no response from requester. – ukexpat (talk) 18:28, 24 February 2010 (UTC)

The Chain Gang of 1974

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:LCLproject/The_Chain_Gang_of_1974

I'm new to wiki and any help would be greatly appreciated.

LCLproject (talk) 06:55, 8 December 2009 (UTC)

I'm not sure it meets the notability guidelines, but the main things I think you need to do are to break it up into a lede and a paragraph or two, and also supply some references from local newspapers or magazines. Let me know on my talk page if you'd like to have some help with that. Nuujinn (talk) 23:10, 8 February 2010 (UTC)

{{Done}} - in mainspace and reviewed. – ukexpat (talk) 18:35, 24 February 2010 (UTC)

Hello everyone! Ive created an article about David Siegel and would love any feedback on it. This is my first article, and I tried to get everything right but Id really like to make sure. Also, Im really clueless on the review process...how and when does that happen? Thanks so much! --Dragn77 (talk) 23:53, 29 December 2009 (UTC)

Looks like a pretty good start to me, nice to see some reliable inline refs in a new article for a change. There are a few formatting issues with this article though. Firstly, overlinking - well known, major geographic locations like America and Miami don't need to be wikilinks, as per

WP:OVERLINKING

. Also, I personally don't like to see abbreviations like FL in the main body of the text, not everyone who reads wikipedia is familiar with U.S. state abbreviations - I would actually write Florida for clarity and ease of understanding. Florida also doesn't require a wikilink.

Song titles shouldn't be italicized and should be within quotation marks like - "

MOS:MUSIC. Billboard Hot 100 should be formatted and wikilinked like this - Billboard Hot 100. Also, the last two paragraphs are in need of some additional wikilinks and formatting, on things like Billboard magazine, bass, and rock band for example. The discography section is good but could do with being sub-divided into the artists own releases, guest appearances and various artists compilation appearances. Take a look at the Gene Parsons

page and see how the discography there is sub-divided for clarity. This is kind of how I would present the discographical info in this article.

Lastly, as someone totally unfamiliar with the artist, I feel that the part where it says "as well as co-writing 3x certified platinum song by the RIAA" is confusing. Do you mean he's written three platinum certified songs or one triple platinum certified song? This ambiguity needs addressing.

All of these points I've made might sound like there's a lot wrong with the article but actually, the majority of its problems fall under the heading of formatting. There's not much actually wrong with the presentation of the article or its text. I'm happy to give you a hand on this article if you want me to but I'll refrain unless you specifically ask me to help. --Kohoutek1138 (talk) 02:56, 30 December 2009 (UTC)

Dragn77, It is a nice start, I would try and include some biographical info as well. The article is for the most part his song credits and removing some might help with not only the size but the OVERLINKING. The artist's hits would be good or try and compress the section. --NortyNort (talk) 22:57, 5 January 2010 (UTC)

{{Done}} – ukexpat (talk) 18:36, 24 February 2010 (UTC)

I've greatly expanded the Klingle Road article http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Klingle_Road , and perhaps this will no longer be classified as a "stub". Abuelo jack (talk) 17:04, 30 December 2009 (UTC)

Well, at first glance, it certainly looks to me as if it's big enough and comprehensive enough not to be rated as a stub any more. However, a bigger problem is that this article had no Lead section - that is, the paragraph or two at the start of the article, before the first "The automobile road" section. Check out

WP:LEAD for details on how to construct a suitable lead section. Don't be afraid to repeat info in the lead that is touched on elsewhere in the article because that's exactly what a lead section should do - give a short, overview of the most important points of an article for the casual reader. If people want more info then they can read the rest of the article. Check out the lead section for the album Mr. Tambourine Man, which I was recently involved in writing, and you'll see how it touches upon all of the most important points regarding the song - then these same points are covered in much more detail later on within the main body of the article. --Kohoutek1138 (talk

) 17:48, 30 December 2009 (UTC)

Kim West

{{Done}} - in mainspace and reviewed. – ukexpat (talk) 18:54, 24 February 2010 (UTC)

I've just written this article about a fashion designer who was well known in the 80s and early 90s as part of Wikiproject fashion. She's particularly interesting because she used latex as a fabric and had to fight preconceptions of that fabric to gain acceptance. Please let me know your thoughts on the article. thanks Andygrub (talk) 14:14, 31 December 2009 (UTC)

Seems like a reasonable start, but I think you need more references to meet the notibility guidelines and also to flesh out the article as it's pretty sparse now. Nuujinn (talk) 02:49, 11 February 2010 (UTC)

{{Done}} - no response from requester. – ukexpat (talk) 18:55, 24 February 2010 (UTC)

Daisy Alliance is an article I have just written. Before continuing, I would like to know whether being both author/editor and founder of Daisy Alliance would be a COI. Bruce RothBrucearoth (talk) 16:17, 1 January 2010 (UTC)

Yes, it would be a

like an advertisement

. However, you may continue work if you "exercise great caution".

If you have already written the article, make a userspace draft (see

talk page

and avoid making edits to the article other than undoing blatant vandalism. Rather, request changes on the article's talk page.

First things first, though- establish the

WP:GNG and Wikipedia:Notability (organizations and companies). Liqudluck✽talk

23:53, 1 January 2010 (UTC)

Andre Begin

{{Done}} - in mainspace and reviewed. – ukexpat (talk) 18:56, 24 February 2010 (UTC)

User:Montrealfitness/Andre Begin

I am writing to request feeback, Thank you kindly. Montrealfitness (talk) 05:01, 4 January 2010 (UTC)

Montrealfitness, looks like a good start.

• I would fix the external links with this coding: *[http://www.musclememory.com/showArticle.php?mb671136 Muscle Builder, Vol 9, No 8, Page 36, November 1967]
• Maybe do a biography info box, see Template:Infobox person.
• The career sections can be sub-sectioned under a "Professional life" section.
• The Dedication to Holistic Health lifestyle can be placed elsewhere or removed.
• Try and break up the intro in separate paragraphs or remove/compress some info.

I created this bio with the biography template, for example: John L. Savage. Hope this helps. --NortyNort (talk) 23:20, 5 January 2010 (UTC)

{{Done}} - in mains space and reviewed. – ukexpat (talk) 19:08, 24 February 2010 (UTC)

I would like to request feedback on my article, David R. Gamperl. It is a biography of an entrepreneur who is based in Chicago, Illinois. Thank you, Carmelita Rubin 17:09, 4 January 2010 (UTC) —Preceding unsigned comment added by CarmelitaRubin (talk • contribs)

The article is nicely laid out, but my worry is that that the subject is probably not notable. If one of the companies he has been involved in is notable, then the usual thing to do would be to have an article on that company and mention its founder or leader in that article. And if a businessperson has not been involved in any companies that are notable enough for their own article, then that businessperson is almost certainly not notable in their own right. Have a good read through the guidelines at

WP:Notable. Itsmejudith (talk

) 17:27, 4 January 2010 (UTC)

Sustainable Electronics Initiative

{{Done}} - in mainspace and reviewed. – ukexpat (talk) 19:17, 24 February 2010 (UTC)

Sustainable Electronics Initiative needs your feedback. Please take a moment to give us your comments. Thanks!!

Timonkhsu (talk) 21:16, 4 January 2010 (UTC)

{{Done}} - in mainspace and reviewed. – ukexpat (talk) 19:36, 24 February 2010 (UTC)

Scoliosis Research Society Scoliosis Research Society

Msr250 (talk) 22:47, 4 January 2010 (UTC)

User:Msr250/Scoliosis Research Society

You need independent coverage of the subject. "'Independent of the subject' excludes works produced by those affiliated with the subject including (but not limited to): self-publicity, advertising, self-published material by the subject, autobiographies, press releases, etc." - Wikipedia:Notability#General notability guideline. :Something like "the SRS has gained recognition as one of the world's premier spine societies" is unacceptable without an inline citation from a reputable third party source.Cptnono (talk) 23:57, 4 January 2010 (UTC)

{{Done}} - in mainspace and reviewed. – ukexpat (talk) 19:37, 24 February 2010 (UTC)

Requesting feedback on my new article

) 00:25, 5 January 2010 (UTC)

Thelema12, looks good. I made on minor change in the intro. I made this biography a few weeks ago and I used the bio template. You may want to put an info box in there.--NortyNort (talk) 03:11, 6 January 2010 (UTC)

{{Done}} - in mainspace and reviewed. – ukexpat (talk) 19:44, 24 February 2010 (UTC)

I have created a page for Embedded Systems Conference.

Nherbw (talk) 00:42, 5 January 2010 (UTC)

Hello again, I have added some more links and updated the contents for the ESC page. I would greatly appreciate any help on making the article better. Thanks! Nherbw (talk) 21:07, 6 January 2010 (UTC)

{{Done}} - in mainspace and reviewed. – ukexpat (talk) 19:45, 24 February 2010 (UTC)

Pixetell Pixetell

Hello: I have been working on the above mentioned page to improve it so that it meets the Wikipedia standard. I am employed by the company, Ontier, that makes and sells Pixetell. I have sought the guidance of a Wikipedia expert in my attempt to strengthen the article; I did not write the original version that was initially tagged for possible deletion. I would greatly appreciate any feedback on the article so that it can be upgraded.

) 18:05, 04 January 2010 (PST

{{Done}} - in mainspace and reviewed. – ukexpat (talk) 19:55, 24 February 2010 (UTC)

I created this page to document the medication Gendicine.

This is a commercial product and it is referred to by several wiki pages (e.g.

).

thanks,

-larry Wikilarry (talk) 10:02, 15 January 2010 (UTC)

That looks fine as a stub to me so I've moved it to the main space. It could do with more details and references but it is clearly a notable product and worthy of its own article. Smartse (talk) 13:11, 11 February 2010 (UTC)

{{Done}} - in mainspace and reviewed. – ukexpat (talk) 19:56, 24 February 2010 (UTC)

Hello, I would like to request feedback on my article, Tika and The Dissidents This article is about indonesian band Tika & the Dissidents who received many achievements despite releasing their album on their own label. Thank you. Antosastra (talk) 14:35, 5 January 2010 (UTC)

I have added a couple of maintenance tags which really speak for themselves. The tone, especially in the lead paragraph, is not appropriate, see

WP:BAND. – ukexpat (talk

) 21:03, 5 January 2010 (UTC)

There's some formatting problems with this page. For example, the song and album titles - they don't need to be in bold for a start. You might want to take a look at

Names (definite article). My feeling, from the little bit of research on Google I've just done, is that it should be The Dissidents. However, if this is incorrect then the article title itself is also incorrect and should be moved to Tika and the Dissidents. --Kohoutek1138 (talk

) 22:41, 10 January 2010 (UTC)

Premier Asia

{{Done}} - no response from requester. – ukexpat (talk) 19:58, 24 February 2010 (UTC)

Hello, I would like to request feedback regarding my article on the DVD distribution company Premier Asia. Thank you.

Tdk4051 (talk) 18:32, 5 January 2010 (UTC)

Please take a look at

reliable sources to support notability, and those references must be significant coverage rather than just passing mentions. – ukexpat (talk

) 20:31, 6 January 2010 (UTC)

{{Done}} - no response from requester. – ukexpat (talk) 19:59, 24 February 2010 (UTC)

History of the company I work for. They have changed the way the sawmill industry runs several times. I hope you will consider this submission.

Natrob87 (talk) 21:49, 5 January 2010 (UTC)

A few comments: first, because of your connection with the company, you have a significant

WP:MOSHEAD. But first concentrate on the notability issue, the formatting can be cleaned up later. – ukexpat (talk

) 20:20, 6 January 2010 (UTC)

Swami Shri Punitachariji

{{Done}} - no response from requester. – ukexpat (talk) 20:00, 24 February 2010 (UTC)

User:Only4ufriend1/Swami Shri Punitachariji

Only4ufriend1 (talk) 05:25, 6 January 2010 (UTC)Shivam agrawal 6.1.2010

Please take a look at

reliable sources to support notability. Hope this helps. – ukexpat (talk

) 20:09, 6 January 2010 (UTC)

John Kador

{{Done}} - no response from requester. – ukexpat (talk) 20:01, 24 February 2010 (UTC)

Requesting feedback on new article about writer John Kador. [1] http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:RobertGeorge10/John_Kador

RobertGeorge10 (talk) 19:00, 6 January 2010 (UTC)

Please take a look at

WP:MOSBIO and other biographical articles to see how they are laid out. Hope this helps. – ukexpat (talk

) 19:35, 6 January 2010 (UTC)

Stephen Paley

{{Done}} - in mainspace and reviewed. – ukexpat (talk) 20:18, 24 February 2010 (UTC)

I just made my first wiki page attempt: Stephen Paley http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Idiolect43/new_article_name_here

Would appreciate help.

Idiolect43 (talk) 00:04, 7 January 2010 (UTC)

{{Done}} - no response from requester. – ukexpat (talk) 20:19, 24 February 2010 (UTC)

Deshbandhu: Hindi NewspaperDeshbandhu: Hindi Newspaper —Preceding unsigned comment added by Tarushikha (talk • contribs) 09:28, 7 January 2010 (UTC)

It's probably

cite significant coverage in reliable sources to support the notability of the subject. – ukexpat (talk

) 17:15, 7 January 2010 (UTC)

The_Gore_Effect

{{Done}} - moved to mainspace and deleted per this Afd. – ukexpat (talk) 20:22, 24 February 2010 (UTC)

Hi i would like feedback from the community on this article [[2]] If you have time take a look and post any thoughts in the article talk page, thanks --

) 12:35, 7 January 2010 (UTC)

Speedy deletion has not happened here, it is now back up while talks go on to see if it should stay, if you`d like to take a look and have your say you still can. I would appreciate crits as this was my first try at actually writing an article in my usespace (my first artilce try was a disaster lol) Thanks --

) 14:36, 8 January 2010 (UTC)

I have to tell you, this won't become an article. It will be regarded as a bit of trivia and violation of our

WP:LEDE lead paragraphs. Itsmejudith (talk

) 17:38, 8 January 2010 (UTC)

Why do you believe it violates BLP? --GoRight (talk) 18:33, 8 January 2010 (UTC)

I think it could be taken as gossip that is (mildly) derogatory towards Al Gore. But if you want to argue that it's encyclopedic, please go ahead and do so. Itsmejudith (talk) 14:25, 10 January 2010 (UTC)

Er, why did you delete the previous comments on this request? That was totally inappropriate. – ukexpat (talk) 18:20, 8 January 2010 (UTC)

Sorry man, i replied on my talk page --

) 18:42, 8 January 2010 (UTC)

As in de.wp we actually got this article and it features the main page today, I'd like t osuggest that this article be integrated in en.wp, too. Sure you know about "our" draconian deletion policies, and maybe you could estimeem the article's surviving them as a test for relevance etc. (and, maybe not). I's suggest rewriting the en. article to fit quality standars, it's sure relevant. Regards, -- Klingon83 (talk) 14:53, 10 January 2010 (UTC)

{{Done}} - no response from requester. – ukexpat (talk) 20:40, 24 February 2010 (UTC)

User:Tnakagiri/SkyOne Federal Credit Union

Tnakagiri (talk) 23:47, 8 January 2010 (UTC) Tom Nakagiri 1/8/10

A great start. You could link to the FAA in the lead. Use a piped link

WP:LINK if you need to link from the previous name to the article that uses the current name. Ready to go live, I think. Itsmejudith (talk

) 14:29, 10 January 2010 (UTC)

There is Love and There is Fear

{{Done}} - deleted as copyvio. – ukexpat (talk) 20:39, 24 February 2010 (UTC)

User:Philibration/There is love and There is Fear

Philibration (talk) 20:53, 10 January 2010 (UTC)Phyllibration 1/10/2010

This is my first article about the "I Can Do IT" conference in Tampa Fla in Nov 2009. I have tried to follow the guidelines, but would appreciate constructive feedback to help me with the article.

{{Done}} - in mainspace and reviewed. – ukexpat (talk) 21:13, 24 February 2010 (UTC)

Hi, suggestions welcome for improving this first draft of an article on "Mars to Stay"

Thanks for your help, it is appreciated...

Ericmachmer (talk) 06:56, 11 January 2010 (UTC)

{{Done}} - in mainspace and reviewed. – ukexpat (talk) 21:27, 24 February 2010 (UTC)

I am hoping that I can get some feedback for an article that I created. It is about a noteworthy Appalachian Minister. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Reverend_Bob_Childress. Any input or additions would be welcome. Elmmapleoakpine (talk) 00:31, 12 January 2010 (UTC)

{{Done}} - Communis now in mainspace and reviewed. – ukexpat (talk) 21:39, 24 February 2010 (UTC)

User:Fparvex/new article name here

Hi, I started this article about a project, Comunis, which will produce interesting tools and benchmarks on spatial development. This project runs under an european Program, Interreg IV B Alpine Space, which has also created a page on Wikipedia. - How can I publish this Comunis page on the main page ? - Maybe I am not certified ? - Should I use another title like "Commercial Location Development" ? - What kind of references should I put as it is an international public program? After it I'll link this page from the Alpine Space Programme page.

Thanks for your comments and help.

Fparvex (talk) 13:42, 12 January 2010 (UTC)

{{

20:00, 24 February 2010 (UTC)

Requesting feedback on my first article User:Cyberxs/Mark_Siddall Thanks. Andrew Kadar 04:14, 29 December 2009 (UTC)

{{

) 03:59, 25 February 2010 (UTC)

Jimmy Nichols - —Preceding unsigned comment added by BRMG (talk • contribs)

Draft

Jimmy Nichols is an esteemed keyboard player, producer, and music industry executive in Nashville, Tennessee. He has served as musical director/keyboardist on tour with Reba McEntire and Faith Hill. Other artist credits include: Carrie Underwood, Kelly Pickler, Mindy McCready, Billy Gilman, Elton John, The Martins, Jerry Kilgore, Trick Pony, Alabama, Hank Williams Jr. Sherrié Austin, Keith Urban, Lonestar, Craig Morgan, Jeff Bates, Lee Ann Womack, Jessica Simpson (credited as James Ginnetti), Brooks & Dunn, John Mellencamp, Sarah Darling, Julianne Hough, Tim McGraw, Billy Ray Cyrus, Reba McEntire, Carnie Wilson, and Steve Holy. He is currently the president of a record label in Nashville, Tennessee called, Black River Music Group. Their artist roster includes, Sarah Darling, Emma Jacob, and Jeff Bates. Early Life Jimmy Nichols, formally known as James Ginnetti, was born and raised in Columbus, Ohio. He was brought up in a very musical family, along with seven other siblings. His multi-talented father, Joey “Nichols” Ginnetti, had a huge musical influence on his children. Sadly, Joey Ginnetti died suddenly of cancer, leaving the rest of the Ginnetti family to carry on his musical influence. Career Career Jimmy began playing piano professionally at the age of 10, where he and his four brothers became very well-known around the Columbus area. They became known as “The Nichols Brothers.” Around 1980, The Nichols Brothers landed gigs touring with Eddie Rabbitt, Kenny Rogers, Barbara Mandrell, Mel Tillis, Roy Clark, and many, many others. They toured the country until 1994, when they were finally called to Nashville for a potential record deal. Sadly, their record deal did not work out. The only thing that stemmed from the record label was a chance to be a billboard pick with their song, “That’s When You Know It’s Over.” Before they even had a chance, the record label went under. In 1992, they met Terry and Kim Pegula, a successful business team who believed that The Nichols Brothers deserved another chance at stardom. Although things did not work out like they had planned, Jimmy was connected with legendary producer, David Malloy. David recognized Jimmy’s talent on the piano, and began using him for all of his recording sessions, beginning with Mindy McCready. Since then, Jimmy has become one of Nashville’s top session players. His artist credits include Carrie Underwood, Kelly Pickler, Mindy McCready, Billy Gilman, Elton John, The Martins, Jerry Kilgore, Trick Pony, Alabama, Hank Williams Jr. Sherrié Austin, Keith Urban, Lonestar, Craig Morgan, Jeff Bates, Lee Ann Womack, Jessica Simpson (credited as James Ginnetti), Brooks & Dunn, John Mellencamp, Sarah Darling, Julianne Hough, Tim McGraw, Billy Ray Cyrus, Reba McEntire, Carnie Wilson, and Steve Holy. Recent Currently, Jimmy and his wife, Tonya, have reconnected with Terry and Kim Pegula, and have formed the record label Black River Music Group located in Nashville, Tennessee. He currently is producing and recording Black River artists Sarah Darling, Jeff Bates, and Emma Jacob. References http://www.emu.com/artists/artist_jimmy_nichols.asp http://www.fullsail.edu/?fa=news.story&contentID=19079&section=degreeGeneral&pg=1&industry=no http://www.buddyleeattractions.com/talent.php?id=31 http://www.blackrivermusicgroup.com/about/Jimmy-Nichols External links [3] [4] [5]

Any such draft should be made in your user space not here. Let me know if you need a hand setting that up. A couple quick notes, everything above is not OK without independent coverage for both verification and to assert notability. Also, watch out for words like "esteemed" since it looks like

overly promotional.Cptnono (talk

) 23:41, 4 January 2010 (UTC)

correct date of birth

{{Done}} - no response from requester. – ukexpat (talk) 04:03, 25 February 2010 (UTC)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ranjeeta_Kaur

Ranjeeta "Robby" Kaur (born 22 September 1962) is an Indian movie actress.[1] She was trained at FTII. She has appeared in around 47 films. October 22, 1962 (age 47)

in ur wiki there is two date of birth is shown for Ranjeeta Kaur plz rectife it....... —Preceding unsigned comment added by Sharma1988vivek (talk • contribs) 18:05, 12 January 2010 (UTC)

How do we know which date is correct? Do you have a

reliable source? – ukexpat (talk

) 18:31, 12 January 2010 (UTC)

Jerome Elston Scott

{{Done}} - in mainspace and reviewed. – ukexpat (talk) 04:06, 25 February 2010 (UTC)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Extracare4u/JeromeElstonScott

Hello Everyone,

Take a look at my article. Any advice would be great.

Extracare4u (talk) 00:46, 13 January 2010 (UTC)

{{Done}} - in mainspace and reviewed. – ukexpat (talk) 04:10, 25 February 2010 (UTC)

Globe effect (optics) User:Merlitz/Globe effect (optics)

This is a new entry, related to visual optics and instrumentation

Merlitz (talk) 09:14, 13 January 2010 (UTC)

{{Done}} - no response from requester. – ukexpat (talk) 04:11, 25 February 2010 (UTC)

and provide your values feedback.

The topic seems notable. There is no sources in the article except in the "in recent news" section, but such a section is

links to other articles]. Sole Soul (talk

) 08:50, 14 January 2010 (UTC)

Cowbell Digital Music

{{Done}} - no response from requester. – ukexpat (talk) 04:12, 25 February 2010 (UTC)

Hey, Any advice on my article, Cowbell Digital Music. Cowbell Digital Music http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Casey456/Cowbell_Digital_Music#Future_of_Music Casey456 (talk) 03:28, 14 January 2010 (UTC)

you need to include reliable sources to establish notability, MI2N is unlikely to qualify because it allows anyone to submit their own PR or news releases and distributes them for a fee. You need to find significant independent coverage in reliable third party sources. A quick google suggests that you might struggle with this though results are of course cluttered by the SNL skit

talk

) 14:57, 14 January 2010 (UTC)

{{Done}} - no response from requester. – ukexpat (talk) 04:15, 25 February 2010 (UTC)

Dear Wiki-Experts, Pl review my article at http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pandit_R._K._Bijapure and provide your valuable feedback...

Thanks in advance, Sharad Karve —Preceding unsigned comment added by Skarve (talk • contribs) 15:03, 14 January 2010 (UTC)

• The article is missing
  inline citations
  .
• Contains highly subjective language like "he uses the pauses available in between to add charm to the concert" "a Russian delegation was mesmerized after listening to Panditji’s solo". Sole Soul (talk) 13:07, 15 January 2010 (UTC)

{{Done}}, see below. – ukexpat (talk) 04:38, 25 February 2010 (UTC)

Jason Smart is a local "celebrity" for his work in state politics which has now progressed to Russian politics. His work in post-Soviet politics has been unusual for an American to pursue. I read one of his articles and really empathized with his points. I appreciate any comments or ideas on how this article can be improved. Thank you! Джейсон Смарт известный человек который работает в Америке и России. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Yuriipetrovich/jasonsmart --Yuriipetrovich (talk) 21:31, 12 January 2010 (UTC) I made a couple of other changes since yesterday. I look forward to the editor's comments! Thanks! —Preceding unsigned comment added by Yuriipetrovich (talk • contribs) 17:51, 13 January 2010 (UTC) What else must be done to have my article published? --Yuriipetrovich (talk) 21:37, 13 January 2010 (UTC) Hi! I am still trying to get this article on Smart published. How do I go about that? http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Yuriipetrovich/jasonsmart --Yuriipetrovich (talk) 23:50, 16 January 2010 (UTC)

{{Done}} - in mainspace and reviewed. – ukexpat (talk) 04:24, 25 February 2010 (UTC)

Hello Folks, I created a page on QualNet

. It is a well known network simulator and is woefully not represented on wikipedia. There are a lot of academic references for QualNet, some of which I've listed in the article. Please let me know if this is ready to go live. I am new to wikipedia but have been reading up on the right protocols. Your time checking this is much appreciated.

Best Regards,

LBrown338 (talk) 20:28, 14 January 2010 (UTC) Lucinda Brown 1/14/10

{{Done}} - in mainspace and reviewed. – ukexpat (talk) 04:37, 25 February 2010 (UTC)

Can someone have a look at this article, suggest any changes necessary and help me go live with it? This is a bit of history of the the original de Cusack arrival from France to Ireland in the 12th century, the castle he built etc.

Regards C.Cleeve (talk) 15:05, 16 January 2010 (UTC) 16th Jan 2010

Hello C.Cleeve. I saw that you've created 2 pages

Wikipedia:Cheatsheet is very helpful. Sole Soul (talk

) 16:05, 16 January 2010 (UTC)

Jason Smart 2

{{Done}} - no response from requester. – ukexpat (talk) 04:39, 25 February 2010 (UTC)

Hi! I have been seeking help in getting my article on Jason Smart published, but have not had any luck yet. After this gets published, I am interested in helping with other articles. Can someone please review this, so that it can be published? Thank you! http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Yuriipetrovich/jasonsmart --Yuriipetrovich (talk) 23:52, 16 January 2010 (UTC)

At the moment the article does not demonstrate the notability of the subject as required by

reliable sources that is necessary to show notability. – ukexpat (talk

) 02:40, 17 January 2010 (UTC)

{{Done}} - no response from requester. – ukexpat (talk) 04:39, 25 February 2010 (UTC)

User:Kylerpowell/kylerpowell

```` —Preceding unsigned comment added by Kylerpowell (talk • contribs) 04:22, 17 January 2010 (UTC)

If you are the subject of the article, please read

notable someone will write an article about you in due course. – ukexpat (talk

) 04:42, 17 January 2010 (UTC)

Risk Analyses, Assessment and Management (RAAM)

{{Done}} - no response from requester. – ukexpat (talk) 04:40, 25 February 2010 (UTC)

User:Tvdsme1/Risk Analyses, Assessment and Management (RAAM) Tvdsme1 (talk) 15:54, 17 January 2010 (UTC)

We already have several articles on risk analysis and you will find them listed on the

original research or your personal positions or theses. – ukexpat (talk

) 16:12, 18 January 2010 (UTC)

Collapsing draft article text

Risk Analyses, Assessment and Management (RAAM) Risk Analyses includes: Developing an Inventory of Hazards and Considering Potential Hazard Release and/or Exposure; Reviewing Circumstances that can Cause Problems (Equipment,Facilities, Automated Process Control Systems); Reviewing Tasks performed by People; Considering Potential Hazard Release and/or Exposure; Considering Potential for Incidents, (Harm to People, the Environment/Ecosystem and/or Causing Damage to Equipment/Facilities/Tools). Risk Assessment considers: The Potential Hazard Exposure Frequency, (are Vulnerable Objects such as People, Environment/Ecosystem and/or Equipment/Facilities often Close to the Hazard?); The Hazard Severity/Significance, (how dangerous is the Hazard?); The potential Consequence, (e.g. cut in the finger versus explosion); The likelihood of a Worst Case Scenario Incident. This Worst Case Scenario Incident Must be a Realistic Scenario. Risk Assessment may be done in a Qualitative Fashion using Tools such as Risk-Matrixes and Nomograms, it may also be that Quantitative Risk Assessment (QRA) is required by Law or warranted based on other considerations. QRA includes Calculations of Incident Probability/Likelihood and Potential Effects, (e.g. Gas Dispersion Models and Explosion Effect Contours/Zones). Risk Management is: Defining Appropriate Interventions/Measures, Preventing Hazard Release/Exposure in Priority Ranking; 1.) Eliminating the Hazard, (obviously best option if possible), 2.) Defining Multiple and Appropriate Measures to contain the Hazard, (Strong Layers of Barriers in-between the Hazard and Vulnerable Objects), 3.) Defining Measures to Mitigate a Potential Consequence if the Incident Would Unexpectedly Materialize/Really Happen, (e.g. Water sprinklers mitigating the consequences of a Fire). The TOP principle should be used for Risk Reduction Measures: Technical measures, (e.g. Improving Equipment/Facilities, Tools, Safe Guards, Automated Process Control Systems), Organizational measures, (e.g. Training, Procedures, Organization of Work), Protective measures, (e.g. Personal Protective Equipment such as breathing apparatus). Most often All Three TOP measures are Needed In Combination, (Multiple Layers of Protection/Strong Barriers in-between the Hazard and the Vulnerable Object).

Werd (S.O.S)

{{Done}} - in mainspace and reviewed. – ukexpat (talk) 04:43, 25 February 2010 (UTC)

Draft page: User:Mike n jack/Werd (S.O.S) —Preceding undated comment added 16:58, 19 January 2010 (UTC).

This is actually pretty good for a new article, with reasonable inline references cited. You could use {{

reliable source status of Red Hot Velvet. Obviously cites from the record company aren't independent but are fine for establishing basic facts such as release dates and titles. The cite to http://www.leith.co.uk/ isn't particularly useful -- better would be a cite directly to the page where the project is mentioned and Werd's participation is discussed. http://ukhiphopmixtapes.blogspot.com/2009/12/certified-celtic-connection.html

seems to be a blog, hence not normally considered reliable, and doesn't currently seem to mention Werd anyway. I sugest removing this reference or else linking directly to the p[articualr post or page where Werd is mentioned, and including a talk page note about why this particular blog is reliable (witten by an acknowledged, published expert on the subject, for example), if it is.

I hope this is helpful. DES <sup>(talk)</sup> 17:29, 19 January 2010 (UTC)

{{Done}} - in mainspace and reviewed. – ukexpat (talk) 04:48, 25 February 2010 (UTC)

Hi all,

Seeking feedback on a new article on

, a Buddhist high school in Hawaii. I have yet to upload the logo and some related images, but otherwise I'm ready to turn it loose.

Thanks for any insights...

) 12:37, 20 January 2010 (UTC)

Pretty good for a start. Has the needed sections and some inline references, and enough references for basic support. It would be nice if facts outside the introductory section were referenced. The misison statement, as a quote, should have a cited source for example. It would be nice if there were citations for the outside financial support, the Curriculum the Peace Education section, and the demographics would be better if supported by a reference.

The text "Pacific Buddhist Academy teachers combine traditional college preparatory content with group projects and a global, applied approach to learning. Teachers aim to recognize and build upon students’ individual learning processes as students are taught to think critically, creatively, and to collaborate. Basic Buddhist principles including interdependence, compassion, mindfulness, and gratitude are integrated into all courses and throughout the daily life of the school." sounds like a quote from the school. If it is, it should be cited.

However not of those cites are essential before moving to article space. But if any of the content is taken directly from the school web site or other documents, it should be rewritten or converted to a sourced and attributed quote before this goes live.

Oh overall the tone is a bit promotional and should be made more

objective

.

I hope this helps. DES <sup>(talk)</sup> 23:48, 20 January 2010 (UTC)

{{Done}} - no response from requester. – ukexpat (talk) 04:54, 25 February 2010 (UTC)

Hi.

I created my first article and would love some feedback on it. The article is called Nebraska Compromise in my user space.

Thanks for your feedback.

Cwikib (talk) 22:47, 20 January 2010 (UTC)

Specifically User:Cwikib/Nebraska Compromise DES <sup>(talk)</sup> 23:58, 20 January 2010 (UTC)

The phrase "Nebraska Compromise" does not appear in any of the news sources currently cited as references in the would-be article. The page says "Nebraska Compromise is the name coined for a deal made by U.S. Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid" but does not say who coind the name, nor provide any cited examples of anyone using this name. One source said: "Critics were calling it the 'cornhusker kickback' and the 'Nebraska windfall,'..." but does not say who those critics might be, and does not use the term "Nebraska Compromise". The use, indeed the fairly common use, of this term ought to be documented by cites to

reliable sources

for this to go live. If possible, a cite indicating who originaly coined the phrase would be a good idea.

In addition, I think there have been significant new developments that modified the "Compromise" which are not included in the article as it now stands. DES <sup>(talk)</sup> 19:06, 25 January 2010 (UTC)

{{

) 04:56, 25 February 2010 (UTC)

Hi

I have just created a new article about Jeanne Baron a french upcoming actress who is Guest Staring in the TV series True blood on HBO. My name cindaim and Wiklink Jeanne Baron Talk:Jeanne Baron —Preceding unsigned comment added by Cindaim (talk • contribs) 05:30, 22 January 2010 (UTC) She was also known as Cindy-Jeanne Meslem and hosted different TV shows in France.

Filmography includes:

"True Blood" (2009-2010) "Since: A Sci Fi Short Film" (2010) "Man Without a Head" (2009) "Bouge ta science" (2006-2008) "Les folles inventions du professeur Cogito" (2007) "Gloire et fortune: la grande imposture" (2004) "Casting Live" (2002) "Hit beach" (2002) "Zéro de conduite" (2002) "Clip combat" (2001)

And here is a link to a Imdb to see her pics and resume

http://www.imdb.com/name/nm1770506/

I do believe she is the new french revelation of hollywood!

I am waiting for your feedbacks guys!

Cindaim —Preceding unsigned comment added by Cindaim (talk • contribs) 05:18, 22 January 2010 (UTC)

{{Done}} - in mainspace and reviewed. – ukexpat (talk) 05:00, 25 February 2010 (UTC)

Implicit learning
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Implicit_learning
--Alok Kumar Mishra 09:42, 22 January 2010 (UTC) —Preceding unsigned comment added by Anticipator (talk • contribs)

{{Done}} - in mainspace and reviewed. – ukexpat (talk) 05:04, 25 February 2010 (UTC)

User:Nicole700/new article name here

Nicole700 (talk) 00:03, 23 January 2010 (UTC)

Very promotional in tone, reads like a company handout or a page of a company website. Please read

speedy deletion in my view. Please read Wikipedia:Spam. DES <sup>(talk)</sup>

23:51, 25 January 2010 (UTC)

GameSystem

{{Done}} - no response from requester. – ukexpat (talk) 18:13, 26 February 2010 (UTC)

User:CubeBean/GameSystem

--CubeBean (talk) 22:09, 17 January 2010 (UTC)

As an unreleased product the subject does not meet the notability requirements of

WP:COI as from your talk page you clearly have one. – ukexpat (talk

) 01:36, 18 January 2010 (UTC)

HicCalc

{{Done}} - no response from requester. – ukexpat (talk) 18:14, 26 February 2010 (UTC)

Please review my article, http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Msmsshyam/HicCalc

User:Msmsshyam/HicCalc

Cheers, Shyam.

Msmsshyam (talk) 14:43, 18 January 2010 (UTC)

Several problems: the article does not indicate how or why the subject is notable per

WP:CRYSTAL. Once the software has been released and receive some significant coverage in reliable sources, it may be notable. – ukexpat (talk

) 15:46, 18 January 2010 (UTC)

Digital Leather

{{Done}} – ukexpat (talk) 18:18, 26 February 2010 (UTC)

This request is for review on the Digital Leather article. I submitted the article late last week, and I haven't gotten any review on it as of yet. I look forward to your feedback.

--Azlord (talk) 16:34, 18 January 2010 (UTC)Azlord

The article looks good overall. There are a few bits that are ad-like, but not too many. You did well demonstrating the subject's

notability

, which is why it hasn't been deleted.

• Citations should include, at least, the author, publisher, and access date of the page. The easiest way to properly format citations is by using
  Wikipedia:Referencing for beginners
  .
• While you link to great
  reliable sources at the bottom of the page, the actual references are mainly to Discogs, which contains user submitted information. It would be wise to substitute the Discogs refs with refs to places like Phoenix New Times and Drowned in Sound
  .
• Speaking of that Phoenix New Times article, it uses the same picture the Wikipedia article uses. Can you edit
  Wikipedia:Contact us/Photo submission
  .

Thanks for your contributions. If you have any questions related to these suggestions or editing a general, leave me a message by clicking "talk" in my signature and editing the page. Liqudluck✽talk 22:03, 18 January 2010 (UTC)

{{Done}} - no response from requester. – ukexpat (talk) 18:19, 26 February 2010 (UTC)

User:Emb92/Chronicles of the Nerds is an article that I am writing for a web group that creates various forms of web entertainment (like weekly podcasts). I just want to make sure that it will not get deleted for not fitting to the correct criteria. Thanks for your help. Emb92 (talk) 17:16, 18 January 2010 (UTC)

In case you haven't seen it, the notability criteria for web content is located at

quickly deleted

. To demonstrate a subject's notability, an article should link to (at least) 2-3 sources independent of the subject and its creators that give the subject a more than a trivial mention. These sources may be from newspapers (excluding school newspapers) or their websites, from published books, or other reliable sources. If the web content has received an significant award or honor, a link to a site stating it has won will also demonstrate notability.

Otherwise, the article is nicely formatted (nice inline citations) but reads like an ad instead of an encyclopedia entry. Change the opening sentence to a definition of the subject (Ex. CotN is a comedy video website). Words/phrases like "meticulous", "amazing", and "foremost goal is to receive and listen avidly" are inappropriate unless a

reliable source

agrees. The "foremost goal is to receive and listen avidly" sounds like it should be attributed as a quote from someone.

Good luck! If you have questions about these suggestions or editing in general, click the "talk" in my signature and leave me a message. Liqudluck✽talk 20:57, 18 January 2010 (UTC)

{{Done}} - no response from requester. – ukexpat (talk) 18:21, 26 February 2010 (UTC)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Stefanir/Center_for_Higher_Education_Policy_Analysis

I have gotten no feedback on this article. Does that mean it is ready to go? Please review. Thanks.

Stefanir (talk) 19:27, 18 January 2010 (UTC)

"Does that mean it is ready to go?" Unfortunately, not necessarily. We have a large backlog of requests, and a shortage of editors dealing with them, and sometimes it takes a long time for a request to be dealt with. I have had a quick look at your draft article.

The general style and character of the article is fine: far better than is the case with many new articles, but some work needs to be done, particularly on the references.

You have clearly put some effort into providing references, but unfortunately some of them do not serve the purpose for which references are intended. For example, http://www.acenet.edu/resources/policy-research/index.cfm just links to an index and search page, which does not contain any information about CHEPA. It may well be that, by searching from there, it is possible to find confirmation of what you say in your draft, but a reference should take us directly to the relevant information, not just point us to somewhere we can search from. Then we have a link to a Google books page about a book which is mentioned in your draft. However, that Google page does not confirm the statement to which the reference is attached, namely "The Center's blog entitled 21st Century Scholar regularly features the work of guest scholars from around the country, including Yvonna Lincoln, co-author of Naturalistic Inquiry". The point of a reference is to show a source which confirms the statement made in the article, not just to give a link to something which is mentioned in that statement. Likewise the statement "The center is run by Dr. William G. Tierney, University Professor and Wilbur-Kieffer Professor of Higher Education at the Rossier School of Education" is followed by a reference to a page which mentions Tierney but does not tell us that the center is run by him, which is what the sentence says to which this is supposed to be a reference. Likewise the statement that Tierney "is the author of more than 16 books on higher education and the editor of more than 40 books, monographs and journals" is followed by a reference to a page which does not mention the number of his publications. So it goes on. Also, some of the information given is of marginal relevance: for example, the fact that Tierney runs the center is clearly of direct relevance to the article, but how many publications he has is of direct relevance to him, but only indirect relevance to an article on the center. Of course there is always an element of judgement as to how direct the connection has to be, but I do not think this information is relevant enough to justify inclusion, and the same applies to some other statements.

References should establish two things: (1) there is substantial independent coverage of the topic, to show that the topic is notable enough to have an article about it, and (2) the statements in the article can be verified from reliable sources. The requirements for these two purposes are a little different. The second purpose can often be achieved by references from sources from the subject of the article, or sources related to it (in this case sources from CHEPA, USC, etc). However, for establishing notability independent sources are essential, and at present these are lacking.

I hope these remarks have been helpful.

talk

) 15:03, 19 January 2010 (UTC)

{{Done}} - deleted per Wikipedia:Articles for deletion/The Challenge Series. – ukexpat (talk) 18:23, 26 February 2010 (UTC)

The Challenge Series- a seven part book about the sustainable construction of the 2010 Olympic Village in Vancouver, Canada. An overview of the book, including content, contributors and sponsors. The Challenge Series Ashlee Jollymore, January 18 2010 Lunette 18 (talk) 20:38, 18 January 2010 (UTC)

The main issue here is the "sponsorship" section, which an entire section of external links. Please see

WP:NOTLINK for more details. -Reconsider!

05:08, 19 January 2010 (UTC)

SME Dynamic Systems LTD

{{Done}} - no response from requester. – ukexpat (talk) 18:24, 26 February 2010 (UTC)

User:Const mc/SME Dynamic Systems LTD

Hello, this is my first article, I've tried to add information about a ukrainian game development company. Please give some feedback on it. Am I moving in the right direction?

Const mc (talk) 22:14, 18 January 2010 (UTC)

Not a bad start, you are definitely heading in the right direction. Next step would be to expand the article and find some more references. -Reconsider! 09:03, 19 January 2010 (UTC)

Please take a look at

reliable sources to support notability. – ukexpat (talk

) 17:55, 19 January 2010 (UTC)

Nuzhat J. Haneef

{{Done}} - no response from requester. – ukexpat (talk) 18:25, 26 February 2010 (UTC)

Hello Wiki editors,

I would be really appreciate any feedback on my draft article.

User:Wixnstuff/Nuzhat J. Haneef ‎

Oh! And in the first paragraph of my draft I wrote:

Proper title noted as: Recognizing the Messiah. Assessing Mirza Ghulam Ahmad of Qaadiyaan: His Claims, His Views, His Character, and His Movement (Published September 2004).

How do I link the title of the book to reference link below that I have in the External Links section? Or do I even need to do that?

Thanks for help. Keep up the good work!

Wixnstuff (talk) 07:56, 19 January 2010 (UTC)Wixnstuff

You could use {{cite book}} and fill in the appropriate fields as specified on the template page. Then put that between a ref and a /ref tag, which i see you already know how to do. You could also use that for other books mentioned in the (would-be) article.

However, there are larger problems than this.

• One is that you appear to be writing an article about yourself. As you will see in our
  autobiography guideline
  , this is strongly discouraged. (If I am mistaken here, my apologies.)
• Another is that the article as written is in form a biographical article but seems to be more about the book than about the author. If the main subject is the book, make it an article about the book.
• A third, and larger yet, is that you need some independent
  notability guideline for biographies
  . Addressing the issue of cited sources is far more vital than any formatting issues for this would-be article.

I hope this is helpful. DES <sup>(talk)</sup> 15:25, 19 January 2010 (UTC)

{{Done}} - in mainspace and reviewed. – ukexpat (talk) 18:26, 26 February 2010 (UTC)

Any suggestions or feedback on my article would be greatly appreciated. It's my first one!

Krisgab (talk) 23:30, 19 January 2010 (UTC)

Here's a direct link for reviewers-

04:01, 20 January 2010 (UTC)

Technically this is not a bad start. There is a paragraph duplicated in the introductory section (often called "the lede" on Wikipedia) and the "Theory" section. This should be at lest reworded in one place, or not repeated. One issue is that this seems exclusively positive, particularly for what seems a form of

fringe views, one-man theories, and minority but widely supported views. Also, the one web site linked and some of the refernces' titles seem to imply that this treatment method is the proprietary method of L. Silva and those associated with him/her, or is pretty much solely advocated by such people. If so, the cited references are mostly not independent, which lowers there reliability for this purpose. If L. Silva and his/her associates are the sole advocates of this method, that should be stated, for example "Qigong Sensory Training is a specific application from the branch of Chinese Medicine devised and promoted by L. Silva that utilizes..." if there are any truly independent sources that discuss this, they should be added. There should be a clearer statement as to how widely accepted this method is. Good work so far. DES <sup>(talk)</sup>

17:30, 20 January 2010 (UTC)

Thank you for the feedback. This is very helpful! I'll work on incorporating your suggestions. Krisgab (talk) 18:21, 21 January 2010 (UTC)

I've made the edits suggested by Liquidluck. If Liquidluck or anyone else could look at it one more time, I'd greatly appreciate it!Krisgab (talk) 20:22, 22 January 2010 (UTC)

It still seems very promotional, or at least one-sided. There is still no mention of any criticism, nor of reactions of the wider medical community, positive or negative. Six of the eight cited sources have "Silva, L." as an author or co-author. One of the remaining two is published by the "Qigong Institute" which doesn't exactly sound independent of the concept. The concluding statement "Treatments based on Chinese medicine are directed to the cause of an illness rather than the symptoms, and, when given for a sufficient length of time, provide lasting change." should probably be qualified with "according to its advocates" or some such, and in any case cited. DES <sup>(talk)</sup> 19:34, 25 January 2010 (UTC)

Also, the first paragraph in the "Theory" section is still very similar in wording to the introductory paragraph, which makes it seem repetitious to a reader. DES <sup>(talk)</sup> 19:34, 25 January 2010 (UTC)

{{Done}} - in mainspace and reviewed. – ukexpat (talk) 18:47, 26 February 2010 (UTC)

How can I post an article about a PBS filmmakers? Can someone check it out and post it?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Zb12st12/JedRiffe

thank you zb12st12 01-20-2010 —Preceding unsigned comment added by Zb12st12 (talk • contribs) 00:29, 21 January 2010 (UTC)

See Wikipedia:Requested articles DES <sup>(talk)</sup> 19:16, 25 January 2010 (UTC)

{{Done}} – ukexpat (talk) 18:53, 26 February 2010 (UTC)

Edwin James was the first white person to climb Colorado's Pikes Peak; he is referenced repeatedly in that article, and in the article about the Ojibwe language. Thank you for your feedback.

Edwin James (scientist)

Aiken1986 (talk) 02:43, 22 January 2010 (UTC)

Nice work. I removed the tag and made a few minor formatting changes. – ukexpat (talk) 04:31, 10 February 2010 (UTC)

{{Done}} - no response from requester. – ukexpat (talk) 18:55, 26 February 2010 (UTC)

User:Suzymiller/Divorce Fairs

I would like to develop the draft article on Divorce Fairs which are now occurring throughout the world and yet have no information I could find on Wikipedia. I have posted a short history of divorce fairs and information about the first one in Austria (first in the world) and first one in the UK in 2009. I am interested in bringing together more information on this international phenomenon because I myself (as a single mum who went through breakup) created the first ever divorce fair in the UK.

Comments and contributions welcomed.

Suzymiller (talk) 23:01, 22 January 2010 (UTC)

It is really hard to review this article since there are not inline citations for verification. I honestly expect it to meet the notability guidelines. It really is just inappropriate without the references. One thing that jumped out besides the references:

• You should trim out the end bits regarding the history of divorce. The scope of the article should be the conventions and not divorce in general

Take the citations used (plus more that are independent of the subject) and write a piece about the organizers and why the media (easiest) has said the fairs are noteworthy. Don't go as far as forcing notability. Just find some independent coverage (a write up in a newspaper for example) and cater the article to general info (not marketing). Feel free to shoot me a message or mention it here if you need a hand on the technical side of using inline citations and expressing notability in a neutral manner. Cptnono (talk) 12:12, 25 January 2010 (UTC)

{{Done}} - no response from requester. – ukexpat (talk) 18:56, 26 February 2010 (UTC)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Sysgentvl/new_article_name_here

Trimatrix

This is my first article. Can you please review and tell me how to make this article "encyclopaedic" ? Thanks in anticipation. --Sysgentvl (talk) 08:35, 24 January 2010 (UTC)

This appears to be a bout a specific software product. It needs more context in the intro paragraph, but most of all it needs references from independent third-party

Notable

.

Statements like "Top management can take policy decisions based on Trimatrix reports." sound like

advertising

.

Relevant terms and firm names should be wikilinked, for example "

Business Intelligence

(BI) tools" Not also that this sentence confuses tools and the companies that make them.

Text like "Using the existing systems, the top and middle management teams across the organizations in an enterprise are still not able to review an individual unit’s performance. Managers always want reports to be verified by junior. The reports are static and the supervisor cannot add comments or questions. The junior cannot attach in reply documents or presentations in a report for review. Any new report or analysis or new module takes months for the IT team to get ready." is

original research

unless these vies can be attributed to a named source in a citation to a published comment.

the section "more features added" particularly reads like an advertisement.

The "Triangulation" section does not explain how the three figures are supposed to confirm each other or are checked against each other.

Also if you work for or with the makers of this product, please read our

conflict of interest page. DES <sup>(talk)</sup>

03:51, 26 January 2010 (UTC)

Disclosure: I am an employee of Cognos, and apparently the product described here competes with some of the products made by Cognos. DES <sup>(talk)</sup> 03:36, 26 January 2010 (UTC)

{{Done}} – ukexpat (talk) 18:59, 26 February 2010 (UTC)

I have begun to do some copy edits and would like some feedback on the article Bumper_pool. Is this article appropriate in tone and style? Any suggestions for how to improve the quality of the prose would be appreciated,
Nuujinn (talk) 19:46, 24 January 2010 (UTC)

Looks pretty good to me. I have added some references and used those and the reference sources already present to cite may statemetns previously uncited. A section on the history of the game would not be amiss, IMO. DES <sup>(talk)</sup> 22:44, 25 January 2010 (UTC)

Thanks for the help. I agree about the history, I'll see what I can find, but I'm really just trying to help out with the copy editing

Nuujinn (talk) 23:18, 25 January 2010 (UTC)

There is a history page at the cited vendor site, but much of it is covered by the history sections in the articels on the class of games. DES <sup>(talk)</sup> 23:29, 25 January 2010 (UTC)

{{Done}} - no response from requester. – ukexpat (talk) 19:00, 26 February 2010 (UTC)

Please ignore - this title seems to be used before and deleted. Will repost under a new page name. —Preceding unsigned comment added by MediaVulture (talk • contribs) 21:50, 24 January 2010 (UTC)

Please review the following wiki page written about the feature film the Beatnicks —Preceding unsigned comment added by MediaVulture (talk • contribs) 21:39, 24 January 2010 (UTC)

You mean

WP:NFILMS. As currently drafted it does not appear that the film is notable and therefore does not meet Wikipedia's principal inclusion criterion. – ukexpat (talk

) 20:29, 25 January 2010 (UTC)

Sigi Schmid

{{Done}} - not really a WP:RFF question.

Hi request for feedback watchers. I sometimes poke around here and noticed that it is usually new articles that get listed. I was considering bypassing GA and going feedback->PR->FA as is mentioned at Wikipedia:Peer review. A handful of editors are going for featured topic with Seattle Sounders FC, and I wanted to get some fresh eyes on an article. Knowing me, there should be plenty of grammatical screw ups. General layout, wikifying, and other fun stuff might also be a concern. Anyone feel like offering some feedback to make Sigi Schmid a quality article? Thanks!Cptnono (talk) 12:05, 25 January 2010 (UTC)

{{Done}} - no response from requester. – ukexpat (talk) 19:04, 26 February 2010 (UTC)

Natalie Wynne Pace

User:HeatherSophia/NatalieWynnePace

````HeatherSophia, 20100125 —Preceding unsigned comment added by HeatherSophia (talk • contribs) 15:28, 25 January 2010 (UTC)

This reads as rather promotional, a more objective tone would be helpful. Are there no negative facts or criticism that are well sourced? The

WP:MOSTM says "Do not use the ™ and ® symbols, or similar, in either article text or citations, unless unavoidably necessary for context". I have removed a tm symbol. Who says she is "a trusted source of financial news."? cite needed. I also added several wiki-links, more are probably needed. DES <sup>(talk)</sup>

02:02, 26 January 2010 (UTC)

User:Gewald/iKnowWare could use some feedback

{{Done}} - no response from requester. – ukexpat (talk) 19:05, 26 February 2010 (UTC)

User:Gewald/iKnowWare Is this close to being ready to go public? What should I add if not? This is my first contribution.

Gewald (talk) 16:54, 25 January 2010 (UTC)

In view of its Forbes thing, the company is probably notable as required by

too promotional and sounds like it was lifted straight out of the company's marketing literature. It will need to be toned down before it is moved to the mainspace. Hope this helps. – ukexpat (talk

) 18:10, 25 January 2010 (UTC)

{{Done}} - no response from requester. – ukexpat (talk) 19:06, 26 February 2010 (UTC)

This page provides information about the software company developer express. There are references, citations, internal, and external links. I'd appreciate a sanity check before publishing it.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Pkimmel/DevExpress#References

Pkimmel (talk) 18:12, 26 January 2010 (UTC)

Paul Kimmel

There is a referencing problem at the moment. All of your references are to either the company's own web site, to press releases, or to blog/forum posts. To verify an award by SD magazine, you should link to a page from SD that reports the award, or if that is not online, state the issue and date where this was announced. The same for ASP.NET Pro Magazine. References to third-party, independent,

notability

. I suspect that this firm is actually notable, but you haven't yet provided the sources to demonstrate this.

Also, Wikipedia articles should never be used as references. They can be linked in the body of the article or in a see also section.

I hope this is helpful. DES <sup>(talk)</sup> 18:24, 26 January 2010 (UTC)

{{Done}} - in mainspace and reviewed. – ukexpat (talk) 19:14, 26 February 2010 (UTC)

User:Komowkwa/Robert M. Strozier

This is my first article and it concerns the person for whom the main FSU library is named.

Komowkwa (talk) 01:28, 27 January 2010 (UTC)

Looks pretty good. I have taken the liberty to format the citations with proper citation templates, and use named references to indicate where a give source supports multiple statements in the article. I also did some minor copyediting.

There might be more about what Strozier did during his term as president. You might have a look at http://news.google.com/archivesearch?um=1&cf=all&ned=us&hl=en&q=Robert+M.+Strozier (google news archive search)

The paragraph about the CIA connection is a bit dubious here since there is no statement that Strozier was involved with the CIA aspect while he was a member of the advisory council of the National Student Association, nor that the revelations were connected with him or affected his reputation in any way. What does the CIA involvement with the National Student Association have to do with Strozier? You don't say, nor do your sources.

Still I think this is ready to be moved to the main article space. Notability seems obvious DES <sup>(talk)</sup> 09:52, 27 January 2010 (UTC)

By the way, there is apparently a different Robert M. Strozier (a son?) who has written severla scholarly books, see http://www.worldcat.org/search?q=au%3A%22Strozier%2C+Robert+M.%22&qt=hot_author

I hope this is helpful. DES <sup>(talk)</sup> 09:52, 27 January 2010 (UTC)

Thanks for spending your time on this. I really appreciate this and will follow up regarding your suggestions.

I was at FSU from 1964 through the end of 1974. When the CIA stuff came out in 1967, it was a pretty hot topic. I recall that the school planned to drop out of the NSA which they had joined while Strozier was President. However, I looked a little bit for some current references regarding the CIA/NSA stuff and did not find what I was looking for in the newspaper archives. I remember that there were some news reports on the subject and my search did find a reference for one of the statements in another article regarding the CIA. I think I can hold that section out of this article for now and will try to figure out how to "move" this to the main article space.Komowkwa (talk) 02:27, 28 January 2010 (UTC)

It might well justify an article of its own, but the relevance to Strozier is not established by the cites in the article so far. I see you did the move just fine DES <sup>(talk)</sup> 14:10, 28 January 2010 (UTC)

{{Done}} - no response from requester. – ukexpat (talk) 19:17, 26 February 2010 (UTC)

The article is posted at: User:Jwkerastas/SmartSignal

The name of the article is SmartSignal Corporation.

Jwkerastas (talk) 17:46, 27 January 2010 (UTC)Jwkerastas, January 27, 2010

I apologize if I haven't correctly provided the correct information - this is my first article for Wikipedia!

A reasonable start. There are several major issues, however:

• general notability guideline
  .
• Formatting. Most of the article is now in an outline style. This should all be expanded into prose (or dropped where overly detailed) before the article goes live.
• References. See our
  reliable sources
  . Note that awards should be supported with citations to independent sources, not company pages, documents, or press releases, whenever possible.

Also, if you work for or with the company, you should read our

conflict of interest policy

and be very careful if it applies to you and this subject.

I'm afraid this is a long way from begin ready to go live.

I hope this is helpful. DES <sup>(talk)</sup> 20:52, 27 January 2010 (UTC)

Thank your for the feedback! I will redouble my efforts to learn how to do this properly. I will a) add links for references, b) transform the outline format into prose, and c) better integrate references. I used to work for SmartSignal, which is how I learned about it's technology, but left in March 2007. Jwkerastas Jwkerastas (talk) 20:50, 28 January 2010 (UTC)

Dear DESiegel|DES,

I've tried to follow your instructions but seem to have goofed up the structuring of my references - can you please help? Jwkerastas 18:49, 28 January 2010 Jwkerastas Jwkerastas (talk) 00:51, 29 January 2010 (UTC)

Will attempt to assist. DES <sup>(talk)</sup> 16:21, 29 January 2010 (UTC)

{{Done}} – ukexpat (talk) 19:19, 26 February 2010 (UTC)

This is just a general request for feedback. I started this page in the fall of 2009 when it became clear that the musical was going to have some life. It's now heading for Broadway and is scheduled to officially open on April 24. Could a few people take a look at the article to offer some suggestions for improvement. I know the plot section is totally unsourced, and I'm working on that. But with a Broadway launch imminent, this article is bound to see a lot more traffic and I want it to be as good as possible before that.

Thanks

Fryede (talk) 19:37, 27 January 2010 (UTC)

As you said, you need to source the plot section. If you can find a source saying that the musical will follow the plot of the album, the such a source about the plot of the album could suffice. OTher than that, very good article.BillyJack193 (talk) 22:06, 21 February 2010 (UTC)

{{

) 17:47, 26 February 2010 (UTC)

This article outlines Purdue University's gifted education programs through a division called Gifted Education Resource Institute. The founder, John Feldheusen is one of the premier names in gifted education and does not yet have a page but I am working on that as well. This can fit in nicely with the other Purdue and College of Education pages and could be a great resource for people in the midwest that are interested in GT.

talk

) 22:49, 19 February 2010 (UTC)

See Wikipedia:Miscellany for deletion/User:Geri Purdue/Gifted Education Resource Institute DES <sup>(talk)</sup> 06:38, 21 February 2010 (UTC)