Wikipedia:Top 25 Report/August 1 to 7, 2021

This page contains material that is kept because it is considered humorous. Such material is not meant to be taken seriously.

Prepared with commentary by SSSB, Kingsif and Igordebraga

⭠ Last week's report

"Sport is like music or fiction or film, in that, for a predetermined duration, it asks you to give it control over your emotions, to feel what it makes you feel." –Brian Phillips

Rank	Article	Class	Views	Image	Notes/about
1	2020 Summer Olympics		3,278,702		One more week where sports fans supported their countries from a distance, even in host city Tokyo as the same pandemic that delayed it for a year forced events without outsiders or reduced crowds. The Games closed on the Sunday this Report was published, to the relief of those who are losing their sleep to watch events late at night. At least the next ones are only three years away and the winter one is 6 months from now!
2	The Suicide Squad (film)		1,912,835		And for another thing that was around in August 2016, DC Comics' supervillainous black ops team had another go, and instead of a messy production clearly showing studio interference, it's a lively and unorthodox production clearly showing writer-director James Gunn is a weird guy. It's not for everyone (specially with the amount of blood, tasteless dialogue and rats!), but certainly fun, and thus reviews have been overwhelmingly positive. The director of the previous maligned version pulled a Zack Snyder: "it wasn't my movie"; weird timing suggests he doesn't want to be compared to a better movie and now knows that fans will get behind directors disavowing their work if they blame corporations. Move along, Alan.
3	Neeraj Chopra		1,840,314		Our South Asian friends managed to turn #1 into their most successful showing ever, including javelin thrower Neeraj Chopra winning India's first athletics medal (and looking good doing it), a gold no less! In total it was 7 medals, including a return to the podium for the country's most victorious Olympic sport, field hockey. And considering fellow billion people nation China usually emasses the same quantity of medals in a single day, it's been long discussed how India never goes well in multi-sport events, from preference (the nation's favorite sport, cricket, isn't an Olympic one) and economics (malnutrition is a big problem, and over 250 million people live below the poverty line), passing by caste and class attitudes that did not favor physical effort.
4	India at the Olympics		1,362,217
5	India at the 2020 Summer Olympics		1,222,400
6	Marcell Jacobs		1,135,626		This Italian sprinter won the Men's 100 metres sprint, taking the crown that had been #10's since 2008, #10 having retired. Marcell then went on to win the Men's 4 × 100 metres relay . This is the first time Italy has won either event.
7	Athletics at the 2020 Summer Olympics		1,114,844		People who can run, jump and throw stuff really well. The United States are still the most victorious, but the dominance of Jamaica in sprint races and East Africa in long ones remains unbroken. And there was an amusing story in that the two guys who were tied for first place in the high jump opted not to do a tiebreaker and just share the gold.
8	2020 Summer Olympics medal table		1,052,094		Americans had gone rogue and started sorting tables by most medals in an apparent attempt to claim you're better than you actually are. And then in the last day the USA gets a few golds - including one very painful for one of the writers here - to still finish at the top, to the chagrin of every other country. This week also saw Burkina Faso win their first medal at the Olympics, in the Men's triple jump. And like in 2016, the previous host country managed to get more medals than when they had athletes in every sport!
9	Simone Biles		961,851		After withdrawing from several events after suffering from the "twisties" (where you lose orientation whilst rotating), she returned for the balance beam, in which she finished third.
10	Usain Bolt		885,806		Like #22, a dominating athlete that went out on a high note at the previous Games yet still attracts people's attention.
11	P. V. Sindhu		875,162		The second medal for #4 was this badminton player, a world champion that added a Tokyo bronze to a Rio silver. Maybe she can dream of a Paris gold?
12	Deaths in 2021		853,706		You take what you get And get what you please It's better to die on your feet than to live on your knees!
13	Lionel Messi		804,464		A former Olympic champion that parted ways with FC Barcelona after decades. All bets are on for where the Argentinian will land. With Barça, Messi became the most successful club footballer ever, so the divorce has fans and ultras close to rioting (at the least).
14	Sky Brown		749,669		One of the new sports at #1 was skateboarding, making many viewers remember Tony Hawk's Pro Skater when the athletes were pulling off flashy tricks and Jackass when they instead crashed on the ground. There was also an impressive amount of young girls winning medals, including this 13 year old "Brit" that last year got very injured from a horrible fall, and has shown her recovery went well by getting a bronze medal! Born and raised in Tokyo, Brown effectively rounded out that podium for Japan, even saying that the host nation's gold and silver winners are her friends from the skate park, despite competing for her father's home nation.
15	Modern pentathlon		748,704		The one Olympic sport that, in spite of not being hugely popular, is always contested. Probably because it is an original invention of the Olympics, and all its athletes need some competition. It was invented by the Baron de Coubertin, who started the modern Olympics, mostly remembered for saying women would never be mentally or physically fit enough to compete. Showing those same ideals, the modern pentathlon is an event designed to test the skills that a cavalryman would need – fencing, swimming, horseback riding, shooting and running – if trapped behind enemy lines. Sometimes, the Olympics is like that, but more people seem to prefer athletic multi-trial sports (decathlon narrowly missed this list). Along with Great Britain winning both golds, some attention was also brought by German pentathlete Annika Schleu failing to perform on horseback, leading her coach to punch the horse and get expelled from Tokyo in return.
16	Tom Daley		714,533		Along with winning his medals at #1, becoming the most decorated diver and finally winning a gold in his fourth Games, this British diver earned attention for knitting in the stands.
17	Jungle Cruise (film)		657,207		One of the many blockbusters postponed by the goddamned pandemic, where Disney again takes a theme park ride and uses it as inspiration for a two-hour-long adventure. The exploits of Dwayne Johnson and Emily Blunt (pictured decidedly not in the jungle) in the Amazon got mixed to positive reviews, and even if one can't trust the high budget to be recouped in a still recovering box office, the extra bucks from charging a surplus on Disney+ must offset things for the company. Not the stars, though, as the Black Widow can attest.
18	Wrestling at the 2020 Summer Olympics		614,609		Unlike WWE, there's no written kayfabe between those matches.
19	Sydney McLaughlin		613,773		Further evidence that a minimum requirement for athletes to make the Top 25 during the Olympics seems to be "is American" (but Sky Brown! you cry; confusing her national eligibility further, the young athlete spends half her year training in California, hoping to compete in surfing as well at the next Olympics) – McLaughlin broke a record (barely, and wearing controversial "super shoes", skeptics will point out) late in the week, several days after much more impressive records were broken at the start of the week by a Venezuelan and a Norwegian. Neither of them have got close to making the list, in case you hadn't noticed. McLaughlin (pronounced "ma-GLOCK-lin", if announcers are correct) then ran in the slightly-concerning women's 4x400 relay, helping bring another track gold home for the USA.
20	Caeleb Dressel		599,964		Matched #22 as one of the few swimmers to take 5 medals in a single Games. No love for the Brit with 4, but we'll mention him anyway.
21	Andre De Grasse		592,986		The Men's 200 metres sprint have been won by the same athlete since 2008, all by #10. That trend ended with these games, with De Grasse winning the 200, and just a bronze in the 100. De Grasse also won a third bronze at these games, taking his all-time Olympic medal tally to 6, over two games. This makes him the most successful Canadian man at the Games (because counting the women, he's beaten by Penny Oleksiak and equals two-sport Olympian Clara Hughes ).
22	Michael Phelps		584,426		The #13 of swimming.
23	Olympic Games		575,565		Back in Ancient Greece, men ran around naked trying to top each other. They also started an athletics competition, which was resurrected at the Turn of the Century (now with added clothes, though not if you're a female gymnast or beach Vball player or a small Pacific island nation's flagbearer). With three exceptions (the first two Games, when no medals were awarded, and the first time it was held in London, when everyone who took part got a medal), athletes now compete for medals, too. The most medals and most gold medals belong to the United States, but only "Great Britain" can say they've won a gold at every single modern Olympic Games (even if they may or may not be excluding 1/4 of their country). Other prolific medal table chart-toppers include China and whatever-Russia-is-doing-now, and formerly places like Germany, France and the Netherlands, which are still good but just overwhelmed by much bigger countries (Britain seems to be clinging on by pride alone).
24	Allyson Felix		562,608		The most successful female track and field Olympian, and the most successful American Track and field Olympian, Felix won another medal in these games, taking her total to 11, across 5 games.
25	2012 Summer Olympics medal table		541,757		Because people need something to compare #8 to. Though why 2012 got more views than 2016? Well, it probably has to do with how before Tokyo (#1), London was India's (#4) best performance.

Exclusions

• This list excludes the Wikipedia main page, non-article pages (such as redlinks), and anomalous entries (such as DDoS attacks or likely automated views). Since mobile view data became available to the Report in October 2014, we exclude articles that have almost no mobile views (5–6% or less) or almost all mobile views (94–95% or more) because they are very likely to be automated views based on our experience and research of the issue. Please feel free to discuss any removal on the talk page if you wish.