Template:Did you know nominations/Kelly Crull

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Template:Did you know nominations
The following is an archived discussion of the DYK nomination of the article below. Please do not modify this page. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page (such as this nomination's talk page, the article's talk page or Wikipedia talk:Did you know), unless there is consensus to re-open the discussion at this page. No further edits should be made to this page.

The result was: promoted by Yoninah (talk) 22:50, 23 September 2017 (UTC)

Kelly Crull

  • ... that while Kelly Crull earned her degree in journalism she worked at KOMU-TV?
    • ALT1:... that journalist Kelly Crull went to college on a tennis scholarship?

Created/expanded by TonyTheTiger (talk). Self-nominated at 23:24, 22 August 2017 (UTC).

Interesting, on good sources, no copyvio obvious. - Forgive me, but I don't like abbreviations in a hook, and actually think some of them should be explained in the article. Reading headlines such as "New On-Air talent" and "Kelly Crull covers the story of a lifetime", I think you might be able to word something more attractive. If not, I'll approve the original, but think that it lacks a word. --Gerda Arendt (talk) 12:45, 24 August 2017 (UTC)
  • I am not sure that I understand your issue. Station call letters are not abbreviations. I don't see any other abbreviation in either hook that I have presented. Could you elaborate on your suggestion.--
    WP:WAWARD
    ) 04:24, 25 August 2017 (UTC)
Sorry about my ignorance. The station call letters look like an abbreviation to me, - how would I know what it is? Not knowing what it is, I don't get interested. - Do you say "I work BBC"? --Gerda Arendt (talk) 06:25, 25 August 2017 (UTC)
BBC would be the parallel to
WP:WAWARD
) 10:17, 25 August 2017 (UTC)
Do you still have an objection or suggestion?--
WP:WAWARD
) 10:21, 25 August 2017 (UTC)
  • Reviewing:
    WP:WAWARD
    ) 14:24, 25 August 2017 (UTC)
Same as before, and I think I explained: you say these "codes" are known, and I tell you I don't know KOMU-TV, and I expect other readers also to not know. If you want to attract only those who know (because it's truly unattractive if you don't know) I
approve that hook for you, but I'll keep this watched for better suggestions, such as "story of a lifetime" ;) --Gerda Arendt (talk) 15:16, 25 August 2017 (UTC)
  • The remaining hook is not grammatically correct. You can work for or at a station (the article actually uses "for"), but you cannot "work KOMU-TV". Also, the source given says that the work at KOMU was part of her degree, rather than something in parallel with it, as implied by the hook as it is currently written. BlueMoonset (talk) 22:10, 14 September 2017 (UTC)
  • I have added the word at.--
    WP:WAWARD
    ) 00:23, 15 September 2017 (UTC)
  • Not sufficient, in my opinion. While this addresses the grammatical issue, there is no support for her having worked at KOMU for the entire time she was getting her degree, which is implied here, and the source seems to be saying that her work at the station was needed for her degree. BlueMoonset (talk) 01:25, 15 September 2017 (UTC)
  • ALT2 ... that when
    WP:WAWARD
    ) 01:57, 15 September 2017 (UTC)
Can you polish that please, avoiding "journalism that experience", - what's experience in this connection, sounds personal, not fact? --Gerda Arendt (talk) 08:01, 15 September 2017 (UTC)
I can change the word that to either "her undergraduate" or "her academic".--
WP:WAWARD
) 04:02, 18 September 2017 (UTC)
Do it, then. --Gerda Arendt (talk) 07:08, 18 September 2017 (UTC)
@Gerda Arendt and TonyTheTiger:
ALT3: ... that as part of her journalism degree, Kelly Crull worked at KOMU-TV?
ALT4: ... that in order to earn her journalism degree, Kelly Crull worked at KOMU-TV? --Usernameunique (talk) 21:19, 16 September 2017 (UTC)
I like both, ALT3 a bit more --Gerda Arendt (talk) 21:55, 16 September 2017 (UTC)
I prefer ALT3, but also consider ALT5 below.s[.--
WP:WAWARD
) 18:55, 18 September 2017 (UTC)
  • ALT5... that when
    WP:WAWARD
    ) 18:58, 18 September 2017 (UTC)
also, but prefer ALT3 as more to the point. Prep builder can decide. --Gerda Arendt (talk) 20:53, 18 September 2017 (UTC)